


Perception

by PABWECG



Category: As the World Turns, LuRe - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Angst, Beta: Slayerkitty, M/M, PABWECG, Perception, Romance, Time Period: late 19th Century
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-08-21
Updated: 2012-03-03
Packaged: 2018-11-21 02:41:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 35,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11348193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PABWECG/pseuds/PABWECG
Summary: Previously posted to LiveJournalThe year is 1898, and the town is Oakdale. 18-year-old Luke lives on Snyder Farm; Reid’s a doctor in Chicago. You’ll figure the rest out.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.
> 
> Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, Henry, among others.  
 **Warnings:** Nope

**Summary:** The year is 1898, and the town is Oakdale. Luke lives on Snyder Farm; Reid’s a doctor in Chicago. You’ll figure the rest out.

This story is based on a prompt from the winning-bidder of my fic on the Japan Auction, which was, I know, eons ago. So, thank you to Smoothlikebutta for this very fun prompt! It's not finished yet, but she gave me her gracious permission to start posting it anyway; so thank you to her for _that_ as well!

**Warning, this chapter is a tad sappy...

Thank you to Slayerkitty, my wonderful beta!

**Chapter 1**

Seamus rounded the corner, speeding up as soon as he hit the field. Luke looked up, knowing he would see the familiar landscape, his home, the farm. His father waved to him from behind the plow and Luke waved back. He made his way to the barn, made sure that Seamus was content, gave a quick hello to Ginger in the next stall, before heading out to the field.

It was mid-March and his dad had been plowing most of the morning, needing to get the seeds in soon. Casey would be there in the afternoon, like he was almost every afternoon until school let out, to help out in the busy spring planting season. But this Saturday morning it had only been him and his father. Luke, even with all the hard physical labor, had felt restless, so his father had encouraged him to go for a ride before the noon meal.

It was noon now, and the sun felt good on his shoulders as he made his way over. “Thanks for that break, Dad. I needed it. I don’t know why, but I’ve been feeling restless lately.”

“That’s fine, Son. Looks like Seamus enjoyed it, too.” He clapped him on the shoulder. “Let’s head on in. Your grandmother’s probably waiting.”

“Will Mom be joining us?”

“She should be. She was very excited about bringing her wares into the store this morning, but she should be back anytime.” He looked up and smiled. “Ah, there she is now.” They both washed their hands briefly in the bucket beside the well, before heading over to meet her in the drive.

“Hello Luke, Sweetheart. Holden, Dear. How are you?” Lily asked. “How was your morning?”

“Very good…productive.” Holden answered. “The good Lord has sent us some mighty fine weather this week.”

“Rain at night, sunshine in the day.” Lily concurred. “We couldn’t ask for more, could we?”

“Certainly not.” Holden smiled back at both of them.

“But how was your morning, Momma?” Luke asked taking her hand. “Were your wares well received?”

“Yes, they were. Better than I could have hoped.” She smiled warmly at her son, squeezing his hand. “Thank you for asking, Sweetheart.”

“Luke! Luke!” a small voice cried from the doorway. “Grandma says it’s time for dinner!”

Lily sighed. “I’ve tried to teach him not to shout for us like that.” she said kindly.

“I’ll talk to him.” Luke said, heading over to where Ethan had stood a moment before. He heard his parents’ voices as he walked away.

“He’ll learn, Lily…in time. Remember when Luke was that age?”

“Oh Holden, I do.” Her voice sounded sweet to Luke, as he listened in. “But it seems like yesterday, and it was…oh my, twelve years ago now. He’s so grown up.” She sighed. “Before we know it, he’ll have children of his own. And he’ll be a wonderful father, Holden. He’s had such a good example.” Luke turned around just in time to see her lay a hand on his father’s cheek and kiss him softly.

Luke smiled, feeling so lucky. He had his health, a happy family, a life he really enjoyed, and soon he would receive his diploma from secondary school – the first Snyder ever to do so.

Luke knew that not all of his friends were so lucky. Sure, his parents had their worries – would Aaron ever end his wild days and was Faith growing up too fast? And they had had their difficult times – those two miscarriages and, his heart broke to remember, the loss of baby Emma, who’d been only two when she’d been taken by Influenza. But then Ethan had come along two years after that, bringing the sunshine back with him.

Other friends’ families had suffered similar trials but had seemed so much worse for the wear. They all attended church with the Snyders and that faith certainly helped. But it wasn’t enough for some. Some of them looked so weighed down by life, like they were just trying to squeak by. Their zest for life seemed to come and go with the weather. Luke knew that his family’s happiness rested on the rock of Holden and Lily’s love for them and for each other.

His parents seemed genuinely in-love with each other, even after more than twenty years of marriage. They never looked astray, never seemed to have eyes for anyone but each other. Luke would sometimes hear rumors of other, less ideal, marriages – never divorce, thank goodness, but flirting, crossing the line, some times infidelity. What always made him most sad was seeing how unhappy these people seemed to be, like they wished they’d never married because now they felt trapped. Luke’s parents never looked trapped.

When Luke was younger, he’d felt sure that he would grow up to be just like his parents. He would run the farm, be married, and have children; and life would be good, so good. He’d had no reason to doubt that. His parents had taught him, through words and example, that a person could be good, generous, productive, and happy in their life.

For the most part, he still felt sure of all of that. He loved his family; he had good friends; he enjoyed farm life and he was becoming one of the young leaders in the church; and he would earn his diploma in two months time.

Now he was dating Maddie; that was the only confusing part of his life. He’d known her for so many years; they’d grown up together. He cared for her and they had so much in common. He respected her and thought she was very pretty. He was happy. But lately there was a small voice of doubt - the way his mother and father would look at each other - that seemed different somehow to the way he felt about Maddie. Perhaps that would come in time. He’d never felt as much for any other girl before; and she was the first girl he’d ever dated – ever wanted to date. Perhaps she was the one.

He’d asked his mother once about it. _How do you know when you’ve found the right person to marry? Is it because you have a lot in common? Or you think they’re beautiful? Or you respect them?_ He’d asked.

She’d responded that those things were important, but that there wasn’t a ready-answer. _Trust me, Luke. You’ll know._ She’d laid a hand on his heart. _You’ll just know, in here._

Luke felt better, remembering her words, and he tucked away his doubts and worries – at least for a few more hours. He took off his boots and dirty shirt, hanging them on the hook – and put on his cleaner one for the meal. When he entered the kitchen, he went straight to the sink to wash up in the dishpan, and then kissed his grandmother on the cheek, peeking over her shoulder at the food.

He walked around to the other side of the table. “Can I sit beside you, Pigtails?” he asked as he gave Natalie’s braids a gentle tug.

She laughed quietly. “Do you think I’m too old for that nickname? Faith thinks so.” She said. “She also thinks I shouldn’t put my hair in braids all the time…that it makes me look like a tomboy.”

“Well, there’s nothing wrong with that. I guess it all depends on how you feel. You have been a tomboy for quite a while. Are you alright with that?”

She thought for a moment, and then said. “Yes, I am. Besides which, I don’t want to be always asking, ‘How does my hair look? Should I wear this frock today?’ like Faith is.”

“I know you don’t.” He said, laughing quietly and giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “But remember, there’s nothing wrong with Faith being like _that_ either. She can be who she is, and you can be you.”

She smiled her thirteen-year-old smile at him with a nod. And then shortly after everyone was at the table, they bowed their heads for a blessing and thanked Emma before they all dug in, sharing their tales of the morning.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/


	2. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898, and the town is Oakdale. Luke lives on Snyder farm; Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope

**Summary:** The year is 1898, and the town is Oakdale. Luke lives on Snyder farm; Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**This story is based on a prompt from the winning-bidder of my fic on the Japan Auction, which was, I know, eons ago. So, thank you to Smoothlikebutta for this very fun prompt! It's not finished yet, but she gave me her gracious permission to start posting it anyway; so thank you to her for that as well!

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/  
  
Chapter 2

Luke’s right hand rested on Maddie’s waist and her hand was on his shoulder, their other hands clasped together, as he led her around the wooden floor of the church hall. Supper was finished and Casey was playing his guitar, his granddad on the piano beside Holden on the fiddle. He and Maddie were getting rather comfortable with dancing, having attended the last three church suppers together.

Of course, they had danced together at these events many times growing up, but this was different. Tonight, her long black hair had a blue ribbon hanging down the back, and she looked very pretty in her nice dress. Strangely, when they were in school during the week, everything felt normal – they were good friends. But now, when they went to these monthly suppers, it all felt awkward. Still, she was lovely and sweet; she was bright and had a good heart; they cared about each other. And Luke thought she was the prettiest girl in town.

The waltz ended and they stepped awkwardly apart, clapping for the musicians, briefly looking at each other before their eyes skittered around the room, Luke’s hands going into his pockets and Maddie’s twisting together behind her back. In just a moment, Holden approached, his arm around Lily’s waist, Natalie and Ethan in tow. Lily beckoned over her shoulder and shortly Faith joined them.

“We should probably head home soon, Son.”

Henry then appeared at Maddie’s side. “I think it’s also time for us to go, Maddie Sweetheart.”

“Do you um…” Luke began. “I mean, would it be alright if I walked you out, Maddie?”

“Yes, I mean…I’d like that.”

The Snyders and Henry watched them go out, giving them a few minutes alone.

Stepping outside and down the front steps of the church hall, the cool night air felt good to Luke, after the warmth of dancing. As they strolled, Maddie fell in close to him and he put his arm around her back. Now would come the really uncomfortable part; they’d kissed goodnight a few times now, and it always made Luke feel so confused. The physical sensation was nice – his lips touching hers; she always smelled sweet and rested her hands on his shoulders. He liked the actual kissing, but when he would open his eyes again and see her there, it was like a part of him wished she weren’t there. But then he would see her sweet smile and he would remember just how much he cared about her and he would wish he wasn’t feeling all these confusing emotions.

 

 

 

 

The next day, after church and dinner, in the afternoon, he and Casey went riding. He loved riding with Casey; he loved being with Casey. They were best friends, and Luke always felt a quickening to his step and an easy smile come to his face when they spent time together. After about an hour, they stopped Seamus and Ginger at the pond, and they both hopped down off their horses. It was the first Sunday in April, but it had felt like summer. Luke bent down to scoop up some water to splash on his face and cool off, and then they sat at the water’s edge.

“So, things are going well with Maddie?”

“Um, yes.” Luke wasn’t really sure how things were supposed to go, but he thought that maybe this was it.

“Well, that’s good.” He slapped Luke on the shoulder. “You’re a lucky man.”

“Yeah,” Luke said.

“So, is it serious? I mean, do you think she’s the one?”

“I suppose…she might be.” He looked over at his best friend. “I mean, how do you know?”

“Well, do you think she’s pretty?”

“Of course.”

“Sure you do. Who wouldn’t?” Casey said, giving him a significant look. “I know you care about her. And you enjoy her company, right?”

“Yes…yes, I do.” Luke knew that to be true.

“Well then…that’s probably a good sign.” Casey looked right at him with a tilt of his head. “Does she make you feel like…you know, make your heart flutter…butterflies in your stomach?”

Luke thought about it. He remembered some of the awkward feelings when they were dancing and kissing. Was that fluttering?  
“Maybe,” he said.

“Maybe?” Casey furrowed his brow. “Hmmm.”

“Maybe it just takes time.” Luke said. “I can’t imagine a prettier, kinder, smarter girl than her.”

“You got that right.” Casey said with a raised eyebrow.

They both were quiet for a minute, and then Casey stood up and began to unbutton his shirt. Luke noticed out of the corner of his eye and tried not to watch. “Let’s go swimming, Snyder.” Casey said, dropping his shirt on the ground and working on his pants’ buttons. Luke closed his eyes and bit his lips, but every few moments his resolve would fail and would look at his friend; and the more skin Casey exposed, the more difficult it was for Luke to breathe.

Luke knew how his body would respond – just like it had the other times they’d been in this position for the last couple of summers. As he felt his manhood begin to twitch, he began removing his own shirt; the sooner he got into the cold water the better. By the time Casey stepped out of his boxers, Luke was working on his own pants.

Suddenly Casey faced him full on, totally naked. “Come on, slow poke.” Casey said.

Luke’s eyes fell to the ground, before alternating back and forth between it and Casey’s crotch.

“I am coming,” Luke said, looking away. When Casey turned around to head into the water, Luke took advantage of the privacy to quickly step out of his pants and then practically ran into the water himself.

“Someone’s eager,” Casey joked.

“I just don’t like getting in slowly,” Luke fibbed. “I like to get it over with.”

“Uh-huh. You just don’t want me to see you naked.” Casey winked, leaving Luke to wonder if Casey knew about his body’s strange responses. “You afraid I might be bigger than you are?” Casey continued to joke, and than casually strolled out to the water’s edge, standing with his feet spread wide and showing off all he had. “C’mere, let’s measure.”

“Casey!” Luke – after getting a good look – turned away, not wanting Casey to see him blush.

“Hey, it’s alright. You’re sister’s aren’t here – we’re decent.”

Luke turned his head around, looking only at Casey’s face this time, and said, “Let’s just swim, Case.” And turning away again, he closed his eyes and swallowed before pushing off into deeper water.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/


	3. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope

**Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/

**Chapter 3**

Reid gazed out at the moving scenery as the train traveled across the miles from Chicago to Oakdale. The forsythia was in full bloom. He couldn’t believe he was actually doing this. Never, in a million years, would he have ever thought he would willingly move to a town of less than five hundred – _five hundred_ \- people, a place where the medical equipment was sure to be antique and the attitudes even older. If it weren’t for Pierson, that hypocrite, he wouldn’t be; he would be happily stealing all of his patients from right under his nose. That Pierson could even _call_ himself a physician – well, he could, because he actually was quite good; not as good as Reid himself, but damn close. But Reid could handle that; that was fine with him, he liked the challenge. But not Pierson. As far as he was concerned, Reid was the latecomer and he wouldn’t be upstaged.

And so he threatened to make those accusations; of course they were true, but still, what Reid could tell people about Pierson himself. But Reid was tired of it, the politics of dealing with the egos of other doctors, so he hadn’t fought back. Besides, he actually _did_ want to hang on to his license and Pierson’s accusations could blow that out of the water, people’s ignorance being what it was. So, here he was on a train to the middle of nowhere…hopefully just for a short while; just until Pierson’s patients could realize what an ass he was, and maybe all this would blow over, and Reid could come back to civilization.

 

 

As he pulled into the train station, he immediately spotted Dr. Hughes waiting for him with another younger man – dark hair, rugged, quite handsome. He threw his traveling cloak over his arm and stood with his suitcase and medical bag to disembark.

The older gentleman greeted him as he stepped onto the platform. “Dr. Oliver. Welcome to Oakdale. How was your trip?”

“Fine.” He smiled tightly. “Thank you, Dr. Hughes.”

The white haired man turned to his side for introductions. “Dr. Oliver, this is Holden Snyder, one of the prominent farmers in the area, and a good friend. Holden, this is Dr. Reid Oliver, a highly respected physician out of Chicago.”

Reid met the warm, honest eyes of the handsome man and they shook hands. “Nice to meet you,” he said.

“You as well.” Holden replied with a smile. “It’s good to have you in Oakdale, Doctor. Can I take your bag?”

“No, I’ve got it.” Reid said with a city-bred polite distance, and then added, “thank you, Mr. Snyder.”

“Alright, well we’re over here.” Holden indicated to his horse and carriage. “You’ll want to put that cloak on. Dirt roads, you know.”

“Holden has agreed to take us on back to our home. He had other business in town he needed to attend to. Shall we head off? Mrs. Hughes is very much looking forward to meeting you.” Reid almost rolled his eyes. “And feeding you; I’ve told her tales of your appetite.” Reid half-smiled, remembering the brief dinner they had shared at the medical conference back in the fall. They all climbed aboard Holden’s carriage and began the dusty drive out of town proper, Holden at the reins.

 

 

 

“It was… _interesting_ meeting you, Dr. Oliver.” Dr. Hughes’ wife said. Reid was, again, impressed by the honesty of these folks. “It is definitely an honor to have a physician such as yourself here in our little town. I hope you are happy, for however long you stay with us.”

“Thank you, I think.” He couldn’t help but smile just a bit. “Dinner was delicious, Mrs. Hughes.”

“Well, we’d better be off, my dear.” Bob said, and then turned to Reid. “Let’s get you on over to the widow Snyder’s. I think you’ll like Katie, and she keeps a very clean and fairly quiet boarding house.”

“Fairly quiet?” Reid asked Bob.

“Well, there is Jacob, her son. He’s five, and you know little boys.” He winked, and Reid did roll his eyes now. Had he known about the five-year-old boy, he may have made other arrangements; but it was too late, this Snyder woman’s place would have to do for now.

 

 

 

“Well, I hope you’ll be very comfortable here. It’s not fancy, but it is clean.”

“I appreciate that.”

“Meals are at seven, noon, and six; but you’re welcome to use the kitchen if those times aren’t convenient. I just ask that you clean up after yourself.” The perky blonde went on, her little boy holding her hand and looking up at him with big brown eyes.

 

Reid nodded at her. “Thank you. My schedule, as you can probably imagine, will be a bit unpredictable.

“I’ll let you get settled in. Feel free to sit in the parlor at anytime, really.”

“I don’t want to be in the way, if it’s late and you and your son have already retired.”

“That’s alright. I’ll feel much more relaxed with a man in the house again, especially a doctor. Really, make yourself at home.”

She and her son left, quietly closing the door behind her. Reid unpacked his few belongings, and sat on the bed. He was tired; he had left Chicago at eight that morning and it was now eight again. Only twelve hours, but so much had changed. Brand new people, and new town, soon new patients. He hadn’t had so many people smile at him and wish him well in one day before in his life. It was exhausting; he longed already for the anonymity of the city. And it was so quiet here. He hadn’t heard a single carriage go by since he arrived at the widow’s house twenty minutes ago; and this was at the _heart_ of Oakdale. What had he gotten himself into?

Perhaps he should have threatened to fight Pierson. But just thinking about the man made his blood boil, and Reid realized that as discomforting as it was, he had felt rather peaceful today since leaving Chicago. And, reluctant as he was to admit it, he already had a growing sense of respect for Dr. Hughes. He seemed to be one of those rare individuals who was honest, intelligent, and thoughtful. Perhaps a short stint in the back of beyond would help Reid to find some sanity, and a small measure of humanity that he felt he’d lost touch with in all the cutthroat competitiveness of doctoring in the Windy City. As he lay his head down on the pillow, he very quickly fell into a sound slumber.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/


	4. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope

**Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/

  
**Chapter 4**

Reid straightened out his tie as he made his way down the stairs in the morning; he had to admit, he was actually looking forward to breakfast with Mrs. Snyder and Jacob. Besides the delicious breakfast, he was beginning to enjoy their company. The little boy was full of curious questions and his mother was quite pleasant - as long as she didn’t poke around too much into his personal life, which he was, admittedly, afraid might be the case once she began to really get comfortable. But for now, the arrangement was turning out to be a very good one.

It had been three days and there seemed to be only two other boarders; one of them a nurse at Memorial, and the other an older woman, a seamstress, widowed herself several years ago. Oftentimes, the five of them had shared supper together, but so far it had only been the three for breakfast. Reid was not usually in the house at noon for dinner, already having acquired quite a handful of new patients.

“Kitty Darling, I hear you have a new boarder. The doctor from Chicago.” Reid heard a man’s voice coming from the kitchen, and he settled himself at the dining room table, pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“Wonder what he’s running from.”

Reid furrowed his brows.

“What makes you think he’s running from anything?” Katie’s voice asked.

“Who leaves Chicago to come here?” the man asked. Reid nodded his head at the man’s logic. “It’s probably some juicy secret.” Reid could practically see the man rubbing his hands together greedily.

“Well, if he has a secret, it’s his to keep.” Katie said firmly. “He seems perfectly nice to me; kind, very smart.”

“And?”

“And what?” she evaded.

“You think he’s handsome, don’t you?” Silence. “Oh, Kitty you’ve got that look, I know that look. He’s very dashing, isn’t he?”

“And what would you know of dashing, Henry?”

“Nothing, I just…you’ve got that look.” Reid heard the scraping of a chair against the floor. “Well, I must be off. People to feed in a few hours.” He heard the smack of a kiss. “Toodle-oo.”

The door swung open and out stepped a man Reid could only describe as…extraordinary, and his eyebrows lifted up high on his brows. The man stopped dead in his tracks and ran a hand through his hair. “Oh, hello. I’m sorry…we were just um…”

“Talking about me,” Reid stated.

“Um, well um…yes, we were…but we didn’t um…well…” Henry, that was his name, stammered.

“I can hardly blame you.” Reid said. When both Henry and Katie looked at him, he went on. “What else is there to talk about in this town? And I am quite dashing, so…” and he took a sip of his coffee, winking at the man, and waiting for their eyes to settle back into their heads.

“I’m so sorry.” Katie said.

“It’s fine, really it is.” Reid said. “But I am hungry, and I do have to be off fairly soon.”

“Oh, of course.” And she bustled back into the kitchen, returning with a bowl of scrambled eggs and fresh muffins. Henry stood still, watching Reid.

“Um, Henry. Don’t you have to be going?” Katie asked.

He looked at her, waiting his arms crossed over his chest.

“Oh sorry, right. Where are my manners? Reid, this is Henry Coleman, my best friend; he owns the pub down the road. Henry, this is Dr. Reid Oliver.” She looked back at Henry. “Now, you really _do_ have to be going, don’t you? People to feed, you said.”

And she began to not-so-subtly usher him towards the front door.

Reid heard Henry whispering, “You do think he’s dashing, don’t you? And you’re trying to get rid of _me_ , your best friend.”

“I’ll see you soon enough, Henry.” She whispered back. “And I’m not trying to get rid of you.” She added as she opened the door, practically pushing him out.

“Don’t forget…dinner tomorrow night. You promised. It’s the only night I’m closed.”

“I know, Henry…you’ve had the same schedule for the last ten years.” She gave him a gentle push. “Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten. See you later!” And she closed the door, turning around and beaming a smile at Reid. “Would you like some more? Or bacon? I could cook up some bacon.”

Reid smiled around a mouthful of eggs. “I love bacon, but I don’t think I have time this morning.”

“Tomorrow then.” She said, sitting down opposite him.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/


	5. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope

**Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/

  
**Chapter 5**

“Do you think I should ask Maddie to marry me, Father?”

Holden looked up at his son. “Well, that’s not really my decision, is it?” Holden asked back. They were in the barn, mucking out the stalls together. “Do you love her?”

Luke thought about all the people he loved – his siblings, his parents, his grandmothers – and also his two closest friends, Maddie and Casey. “Yes, I do.”

Holden noticed the hesitation on his son’s part. “Tell me more about her – how you feel about her.”

“I think she’s very kind.” Holden nodded. “We have a lot in common and she’s very pretty.”

“That she is.”

“She will make a wonderful mother.”

“I think so too. I’ve noticed her with Ethan.” But Holden wasn’t convinced. “You’re young, Luke. There’s no hurry, you know.”

Luke nodded and eventually met his father’s eyes. “When you met Mom, you were pretty young, right?”

“Actually, I was _twenty-two_ , but your mother was only fifteen, yes.” And he studied his son’s expression. “When I was your age, I cared for a girl – Molly was her name. We were close friends; she was very kind…pretty…I knew she would be a good mother. She is actually, she did become a mother. Many of the people here in town thought we would be married someday, we courted for a while; even I thought perhaps we would marry.”

“Really?” Luke couldn’t imagine his father with another girl.

“And then you mother moved to town, and when we met, and after we fell in love, I knew. There was no _thinking_ about whether or not she was the one; there was just a knowing.”

“Really?” Luke said again. “You knew?” Luke met his father’s eyes and saw a glow of certainty there.

“Luke, when you find the right one, you’ll know. You’ll feel the kind of love I felt for Molly, like you do for your family, but you’ll feel something else as well. A tug on your heart.” And he tapped lightly on Luke’s chest. “You’ll feel her tug on your heart.”

Luke smiled. “That’s what Mom said.”

“Did she?”

“Yes. She said I would know – in my heart – when I had found the right girl.”

“Trust your heart, Son. When it’s right, you’ll know. There’ll be no maybe about it.”

 

 

 

 

Reid fell back flat on the bed with an exhale, his now limp cock hanging out of his open trousers. He glanced over at the man beside him. “Well well, you’re just full of surprises aren’t you?”

“Were you really surprised? I wasn’t being that subtle at dinner, I don’t think.”

“No, _that_ wasn’t a surprise, but what you just did…well, let’s just say…you’ve had some practice.”

Henry nodded his head, not sure whether that was a compliment or not. “I take it you liked it.”

“I’ve had worse, that’s for sure.” He glanced at Katie’s best friend once again. “No, I liked it…trust me.”

“So, we could do this again sometime?”

“I don’t see why not.” Reid half-laughed. “And at first I thought you were jealous because you had your sights set on Katie.”

“Oh no. I love Kitty, like a sister. But not like that, I couldn’t.” He shuddered somewhat. “Have you ever…been with a woman?”

Reid looked at him, eyebrows raised, then shook his head. “No, by the time I was socially competent enough to make a move, I knew. You?”

He nodded. “Twice. It was okay, but an awful lot of work.” Henry said, making Reid laugh.

“Maybe my stint here in the back of beyond won’t be a total waste of time.” He inhaled, looking at the ceiling of Henry’s room, above the pub. “Does she know?”

“No.” he answered quietly, shaking his head. “Please don’t tell her.”

“Why would I? I hardly know her.” When Henry seemed to believe him, he went on. “She’s your best friend, don’t you think she’d understand?”

“I don’t know. Her late husband, Bradley, was quite conservative.”

“Isn’t everybody in this town?”

“Maybe.” He sighed. “I’m just scared. I don’t think I could live without her.”

“Really?” Reid was genuinely perplexed. “I’ve never…I don’t believe I’ve ever felt like that about anyone, except maybe my mother.”

“You’re close to your mother?”

“I was.” He said without a hint of emotion. “She died. It was a long time ago and I don’t want to talk about it.”

Henry took the hint.

“I did have a best friend once, though…it was a long time ago.” Reid said. “I suppose I felt that way about him.” He seemed to drift back towards a long ago memory.

 

 

 

 

Reid opened the front door to Katie’s boarding house as quietly as he could; it was rather late.

“How is she?” Katie’s voice suddenly whispered. Reid jumped just a bit.

He looked at her with confusion. “Who?”

“Mrs. Jameson.” She said, as if he was dense. “You went to see her because of that cough. You were gone for quite a while, I hope it’s not serious.”

Reid thought long and hard about his fib; he hated lying to people, especially nice people like Katie. This was the only area of his life where he did lie, and it was only because he couldn’t imagine a life where he didn’t practice medicine. Besides, his sex life was nobody’s business but his own. “You know what, I was tired, and I’d forgotten that I had already stopped in to see her before dinner, but I did stop in to see a few others and then went for a drink…with Henry.” He realized he was babbling.

“It’s okay, Dr. Oliver. I’m just your landlady; you don’t owe me an explanation. I was just curious about Mrs. Jameson.” She looked away uncomfortably, and somehow Reid knew that she knew he wasn’t being completely honest. And that bothered him; she wasn’t his friend, he didn’t do friends, so why did her feelings bother him?

“She’s fine.” He said kindly, meeting her eyes. “Sorry if I worried you.” And something happened that rarely happened to Reid Oliver – he wished he could be honest with Katie. But he knew he couldn’t – he couldn’t afford to. “Good night, Mrs. Snyder.” And he turned and went up to his room.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/


	6. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope

**Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/

  
**Chapter 6**

Reid finished washing up and stepped out of the tub; he toweled off and put on his robe. As he walked across the hall towards his room, he almost ran into Katie.

“Oh my, I’m so sorry.” She said, beginning to blush as she took in his appearance. Reid had been staying here at Katie’s for two weeks, which was long enough for him to have figured out the effect he was having on her. How she would stare sometimes and then quickly avert her eyes; the frequent blushing; seeming to make all his favorite foods by coincidence. This wasn’t a new experience for Reid, but it bothered him when it occurred with someone he was genuinely starting to like.

“That’s alright, Mrs. Snyder. It’s a small hallway, a small house. We’re bound to bump into each other now and then.”

“Oh please, call me Katie.”

He looked down at his apparel, or lack thereof, and said, “I think that under the circumstances ‘Mrs. Snyder’ would be best.”

“Of course. Well, once you’re downstairs, and decent, please call me Katie.”

“That I will.” He said with a smile, and then began making his way towards his room.

 

 

Twenty minutes later, dressed and ready for his day, he sat down at the table for breakfast. Bacon and eggs and toast greeted him – and fresh coffee. The two other boarders had just finished and left, so it was he, Jacob and Katie once again. They ate in silence for a few minutes, and then Katie cleared her throat. “There’s a church supper and dance on Saturday evening.”

Reid raised his eyebrows, looking at her across the table, and swallowed. “I see.”

“Would you go with me?” she asked.

When he was silent, she added, “Not like that, just together.”

“Well, I don’t know. That hardly seems like my cup of tea. I’m not a church-goer.”

“That’s okay, it’s really for everyone in town, no matter what.”

“Well, I’m not…” he began, not sure where to take this. “Wouldn’t you rather go with Henry?”

“No. Well, of course he’ll be there, with one of his many girlfriends.”

Reid almost choked on his food.

“Are you okay?”

Reid nodded.

“I would like to go…with you.” She reiterated, and he swallowed again. “You’ve been here for two weeks now, and all you’ve done is work.”

“That’s not true.” He said.

“Yes, it is. Who have you met who doesn’t work at the hospital, and isn’t a patient?”

Reid thought. “You, and Jacob, and Henry.”

“We don’t count. You live here. And you wouldn’t know Henry if it weren’t for that either.” She continued to build her case. “When was the last time you did anything just for fun?”

Reid thought about the times he and Henry had met for “fun” and thought better about sharing that. It was becoming a nice little routine, but it would stay between the two of them. “I went for a drink with Henry.” He decided that was safe to say.

“Once.” She said. “That’s not enough. Everyone will be at this supper, you must come.” She began to clear the table. “The rest of the Hughes will be there; every family in town; the Snyders.”

“Your family.” Reid said.

“Well, Bradley’s family…but yes, mine now as well. Holden and Lily are lovely people, and so are their children.”

“I met Holden. I liked him.”

“Oh please, Reid. Please say you’ll come.”

And her eyes were hard to resist. “Okay,” he found himself saying. “Yes, I’ll go. But I don’t dance.”

“Oh, of course you do.” She said, standing up with the dishes and walking away towards the kitchen, as if the subject was closed.

He stood and gently took hold of her arm. “Katie,” he began. There was a lot he couldn’t tell her, but he also wanted to be clear. “When we go to this supper.” He held her gaze. “It’s as friends. It can’t be anything else. It’s important to me that you understand that.”

She seemed to understand; not everything, but her eyes told him that she had heard clearly. “Okay. I’d like a friend – a new friend.”

He nodded a small smile at her. “Me too.”

 

 

 

 

It was late, very late, and Luke had been woken up by dreams again; dreams of strong arms and thighs, glistening wet; dreams of soft kisses and moans; dreams of a deep, husky voice, and a strong hand on his hard member. Oh God, when would these dreams stop haunting him? He left his bed and splashed some cold water on his face from the basin in his room; he quietly opened the door of his and Ethan’s room and walked slowly up the hall towards the window, seeking the cool night air to calm him and to stop these feelings.

He heard soft sounds coming from his parents’ room; he told himself to stay where he was, but he had to go. Twice now recently he'd stood outside his parents’ bedroom, listening – just for a few moments. It was strange to imagine his parents being together like that. But still, something in their voices, as he listened outside their door, told him that whatever was going on inside was good and was beautiful, and that they both sounded…happy? Well yes, but something else as well. Something that reminded him of his dreams.

Once, recently, the pastor had dared to speak about the sacredness of the love that is shared between man and wife when they know each other – _that way_ ; Luke remembered the silence that had come over the congregation on that particular Sunday morning. Perhaps when Luke was finally married, and was able to _know_ a woman, it would feel the way the pastor had spoke about. It would be like what he heard from his parents’ bedroom.

Why didn’t he dream of Maddie? Why didn’t he dream of any girl? Why did he dream of Casey? Why was it his hand he imagined in those dreams, his voice? Or that of other men, ones he’d never met, but only imagined. Was it because it was only men whom he had seen men naked? Perhaps if he saw a woman naked, her image would replace his. A little voice inside of him doubted this, but still he had no other explanation for these strange feelings that only _he_ seemed plagued by. He had never heard of anyone else experiencing it – except for those strange men that Aaron had talked about. Perhaps there was something wrong with him, and perhaps that was what kept him from feeling that tug on his heart that his father had spoken about.

The sounds from his parents’ room were now increasing and sounding so strange and delicious to Luke. He heard murmurs and he heard his parents quietly calling each other’s name and he heard declarations of love and he heard the word yes, and Luke found it so disturbing and he had to literally tear himself away, because it broke his heart. He found no place to reconcile all of these feelings in his heart and his body. What his body seemed to want was not what it was supposed to want, and yet the want was so strong; he wondered if he would ever, ever be happy…or if he would always reside in this tortuous place between what he wanted and what he was supposed to want.

Still his body knew - despite his confusion – what _it_ wanted; Luke’s manhood, which had softened somewhat in the cool night air, had hardened even more fully now, demanding to be touched. He slipped back into his shared room and under the covers of his bed, and allowed himself to find release. When his hand met his member, oh the relief that spread through his body and heart. He stroked it, and it didn’t take long; when his release came, he threw his head back and silently moaned, as unbidden images of Casey standing naked, at the pond’s edge, came flooding over him. And then he cried – from the relief and the beauty and the despair.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/


	7. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/

 

  
**Chapter 7**

“Reid, stop fidgeting.” Katie fixed his tie again.

“You people do this every month? Seriously?”

Yes.” Katie said brightly.

“And you look forward to it?”

“Reid.”

“I’m serious. You actually look forward to spending the evening with…each other…the same people you see every day in town. The only difference is you’re dressed up, eating some – I’ll admit, delicious smelling casseroles – and listening to probably some eighty-five year old piano player plunk out some out-of-tune songs while you all shuffle around and smile at each other.”

“Are you always this pessimistic?”

“What? This is me being cheerful.” And he smiled a toothy grin. She gave him a playful shove. “You look very pretty, by the way.”

She smiled back at him. “Thank you.”

“Ah, here comes Dr. Hughes and Mrs. Hughes, with…someone…” he said, and Katie turned to watch the Hughes arrive.

“Oh, that’s their grandson.”

“Reid, what a pleasant surprise,” Bob said. “You’re doing something that isn’t work for a change.” And Dr. Hughes and Katie exchanged looks.

“You people make it sound like a crime to work hard, Dr. Hughes.”

“Ah, not so, not so. But there is a time and a place for everything, yes? And please, call me Bob tonight.”

Reid nodded. “Fine, as you wish. And how are you this evening, Mrs. Hughes?”

“Very good, thank you, Dr. Oliver. I always do enjoy these suppers. It does my heart good to see the young folk enjoying themselves, and I love a good waltz with Bob.” She turned to the young man beside her. “Have you met our grandson, Casey?”

“No, I haven’t.” They shook hands. “It’s good to meet you.”

“And yourself, Doctor.” Casey seemed nice enough, and another quite handsome specimen in this small town. Suddenly Casey’s face brightened. “Will you excuse me?” he said, walking across the room towards a large group entering the hall. Reid’s eyes followed him, and he immediately recognized Holden Snyder with a woman he had spoken with briefly in town.

“Is that Mrs. Snyder, Mrs. _Holden_ Snyder I mean?” he asked Katie quietly.

“Yes, that’s Lily.” She said cheerfully.

“She crafts some very beautiful items,” Reid said. “I saw them earlier this week in the store – the items, I mean. They’re quite good. I didn’t know that she was Holden’s wife.”

“Yes, the wool is from the Snyder’s sheep. You should see the lovely things she creates come the fall – sweaters and scarves and so many beautiful things.”

“Is that their little boy – holding her hand?”

“Yes, that’s Ethan, their youngest. Natalie, his sister, is beside him with Emma, Holden’s mother; Faith is the older girl; and that’s their son Luke with Maddie Coleman, Henry’s sister; they’ve been seeing each other for a few months now. You probably didn’t know Henry had a sister.”

But Reid wasn’t listening. His eyes were taking in the older son of Holden and Lily Snyder; from his soft blond locks and beautiful eyes, to his broad shoulders and his obviously strong farmer’s build; he saw him laugh and smile at something Casey had said, and Reid smiled too.

Dr. Hughes’ grandson then said something else, gesturing in Reid and Katie’s direction and Luke’s eyes landed on Katie and then him. It was Reid’s turn to be checked out, but somehow Reid didn’t think the young man even knew he was doing so. When Luke’s eyes returned to Reid’s, his look turned from wide-eyed wonder to worry and he dropped his gaze to the floor.

“Come. Let me introduce you, Reid.” Katie said, pulling him out of his thoughts, and across the room.

She approached the Snyders with a bright smile, and she introduced them one by one. Holden and Reid had, of course, already met, and Reid and Lily commented on their earlier conversation. He shook Holden’s hand and gently took Lily’s; then he glanced with a polite nod at each of the children, saying “It’s nice to meet you.” Lastly his eyes landed on Luke, whom he found staring at him. Luke quickly looked away.

 

 

 

Thirty minutes later, Reid was savoring a piece of pie. “This is probably the best strawberry-rhubarb pie I’ve ever eaten,” he said to Katie beside him.

“Oh, that’s nothing. Wait until you come to the next supper.”

He looked horrified at the thought. “The next one?”

“Yes, next month the strawberries will be ripe. This one Emma made from her canned strawberries – at least she had fresh rhubarb to work with; but wait until you see what she can do once more fresh produce comes in. Oh, her pies, her casseroles, anything she makes really.”

“Who is this Emma? I think I might need to make her acquaintance.”

“I told you…Holden’s mother. She’s right over there at that far table, talking with Bob and Kim.”

They were quiet for a while then, simply watching the couples on the dance floor. Henry was dancing with a young blonde girl, who looked far too young for him, and far too girl for him, Reid thought with a wry smile. Holden and Lily looked good together – happy. Then his eyes found Luke and Maddie; they were talking quietly to each other while dancing, and enjoying themselves; they appeared fond of each other - Reid imagines that they’ve known each other for many years. He studied Luke – the slope of his arm which fell around Maddie’s waist; the movement of his hips as he moved across the floor with her; the graceful curve of his neck, which Reid could see thanks to the warmth in the room which caused almost all the men to shed their sweaters and ties. His eyes wandered over the young man’s jaw line to his lips - Luke licked his lips, listening to Maddie talk, and then broke out into a beautiful smile.

Reid smiled as he watched him. “She’s very pretty, isn’t she?” Katie said quietly.

Reid - surprised - turned to her. “Um, yes. She is.”

“A little young for you, though, don’t you think?”

“Yes, definitely.” Reid said, realizing that Luke was probably her same age. “No harm in looking though, is there?”

The music stopped and people applauded and thanked their partner, and began milling about, some in search of a new one. Casey approached Maddie and Luke and in a moment Maddie and Casey took to the floor. Reid saw Katie looking around the room, obviously wanting to dance, and Reid groaned silently; he hated dancing, but he could do this for her. He stood up and offered her his hand. “Would you like to dance, Mrs. Snyder?”

“Katie,” she said, taking his hand.

“Katie.” He responded, and they took their place out there with the other couples.

They spoke quietly to each other for a few moments and then fell to silently moving to the music; Reid noticed that Casey wasn’t nearly as graceful on the dance floor as Luke had been. Maddie seemed to notice as well, as he almost stepped on her toes several times. There was a lot of giggling going on before they settled into a pattern. Reid’s eyes found Luke sitting in a chair along the wall, watching the dance floor; following Luke’s gaze, it landed on Maddie and Casey dancing and laughing together. Luke seemed to study his two friends, and Reid felt like he could almost feel what Luke was feeling, just by watching his face; the boy seemed to be experiencing a firestorm of emotions.

“Oh, it must be serious,” Katie’s voice broke in.

“Hmm?” Reid looked at her, confused.

“Luke and Maddie,” she explained. “Luke looks pretty jealous, watching her dance with his best friend like that.”

“Oh, right.” Reid responded.

“Can I cut in, Dr. Oliver?” Reid recognized Henry’s voice over his shoulder. Katie looked disappointed, but Reid was more than ready to stop dancing, and so he gave Henry her hand.

He found his feet making their way over to Luke. As he approached, the young man’s eyes left the dance floor and landed on him, and Luke seemed to stop breathing for a moment; and then Luke’s eyes traveled down and back up his body, and his lips parted.

Reid stopped a few feet away. “Do you mind if I join you?”

The young man shook his head, swallowed and then managed to say, “No, please sit.” And indicated the chair beside him.

Reid sat and they reintroduced themselves again, and then Luke commented on how beautiful the band sounded tonight and Reid on how wonderful the pies were. Silence followed while Luke fidgeted, his focus seemingly shifting between the dance floor and the man beside him. Reid was terrible at small talk – absolutely hated it – but he knew that he was the more mature here, so he would have to be the one to break the awkward silence.

“So, Luke.” He began and Luke turned towards him briefly. “What do you do?”

“Um, well…I farm, obviously. When I’m not at school, of course.”

“School?” Reid asked. “Oh, of course. What year are you in?”

“I’m a senior, Dr. Oliver. I’ll be receiving my diploma in a few weeks.”

“Good for you.” Luke turned to face him again and Reid smiled at him. “Congratulations.” Luke’s smile in return nearly took his breath away.

“Thank you.” Luke said. “I’ll be the first in my family to finish secondary school.”

Reid held his gaze. “That’s quite an occasion, and quite an accomplishment. You should be proud, and I’m sure your family is.”

Luke blushed then. “They are.”

They spoke for a little while more, about how Reid’s first weeks in Oakdale had been, and he told Luke a little bit about the research he was beginning. He couldn’t help but notice that the boy’s eyes seemed to light up when Reid spoke a bit about his days at University. Luke didn’t seem all that interested in research or science even, but study. Most young men his age couldn’t wait to get away from their books, but Luke’s eyes seemed to sparkle as he told Reid about his favorite authors and his school subjects.

 

 

 

When the evening got late, everyone began to filter out of the hall, all happy-tired.

As Reid and Katie were saying good night to the Snyders and to Henry and Maddie, he spoke to Lily. “Luke told me he will be receiving his diploma. You must be very proud.”

“We are, we are,” Lily said, taking Reid’s hand with a warm smile. “And we’ll be having quite the celebration. You must come.”

“I’d be happy to.” He said returning her smile. Then he turned his head and again found Luke’s eyes on him, but this time Luke didn’t look away. And he nodded his head just slightly at the young man, their eyes holding each other’s gaze for just a few seconds. “Well, good night.” He said to those gathered, and he offered Katie his arm and they began to head out.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/


	8. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/  
  
 **Chapter 8**

Luke and Faith carried the tomato and pepper seedlings from the cart over to the row they would be planted in. Then they knelt in the dirt and settled into the task together.

“So, Luke.” Faith began. “You spent some time with the new doctor on Saturday night, didn’t you?”

“Yes, we talked for a while; why?”

“Well, what’s he like?”

“Very nice; very smart.” Luke didn’t add _he has the most beautiful eyes_.

“Very handsome?” Faith asked, causing Luke to panic.

“What?”

“I think he’s very handsome.”

“Oh.” Luke said, wiping some sweat from his brow. “He’s a little old for you, don’t you think?”

“Oh, everyone’s too old for me, I’m only fifteen. I’m sure Mother and Father would never let me marry until I’m seventeen.” And then she pursed her lips, and smiled at him. “But I can look, right? I am allowed to do that.”

“Yes, of course you are. With discretion.” He said, and his sister sighed, as if so put-upon.

“But he does seem nice.” She went on suddenly. “A bit quiet but, still…I wonder if he and Katie will begin to see each other.” She looked up again. “Or do you think they already are?”

“No…or, I don’t know…I don’t think so.”

“But, he’s smart and nice, you say?”

Luke nodded, a smile coming to his face as he recalled their brief conversation at the supper and how he’d felt such an instant connection to the doctor. Like he’d understood Luke in a way that everyone else – as much as they cared about him – just didn’t get. He seemed to get Luke’s love of study and literature.

“Luke?” his sister asked.

“Hmm?”

“You were off in your own little world for a minute there.”

“Oh, sorry.” And again he smiled, not really sorry at all. All he knew for sure right now, was that this week, after meeting Dr. Oliver, his life had seemed brighter – brighter than it had been in a long time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reid thrust three more times, sending Henry over the edge with a high-pitched moan, which was stifled by the sock Reid had stuffed in his mouth. Twice more and Reid followed suit. Reid pulled out and Henry collapsed against the door while Reid fell onto the bed.

“Christ, that was good.” Henry said, as he fell onto the bed, beside him.

Reid responded with a grunt.

 

 

 

 

An hour later, he sat at the bar of the pub, nursing a beer, tuning out Henry’s non-stop commentary about…something.

“Oh, there she is.” Henry’s voice became suddenly cheerful. “Come here sweetheart. Luke, Casey…would you like a soda pop?”

Reid tuned in at the mention of that name, sitting up straighter and turning around.

“Maddie, you remember Dr. Oliver, right? You met at the supper last week.”

“Of course.” She said. “It’s nice to see you again. And you know Casey Hughes and Luke Snyder, is that right?” She added.

Reid dropped her hand and shook both of the young men’s. “Good to see you as well.” He said, a smile coming over him, surprising him. His eyes met Luke’s and they held each other’s gaze briefly.

Henry brought over three pops and set them on the bar. “Thank you, Henry,” Luke said.

“Yeah, thanks,” Casey added cheerfully.

“Why don’t you three find a table over there. You can stay a while, right?”

“Thanks, Henry,” Maddie said, giving him a hug. “Would you like to join us, Dr. Oliver?”

“Um, well…” Truth was, Reid was terrified of the idea.

Casey put his arm around his shoulder. “Aw, come on,” and pulled him across the room, where they all sat down. Casey let Luke sit down beside Maddie.

“So, how are you settling in, Dr. Oliver?” Maddie asked.

“Things are going well.” He said.

“Are you very busy with your new research? It sounds so exciting.”

“Um, yes. It’s…busy.” He responded.

Maddie looked over at Casey for some help with the conversation. Casey put his arm around Reid’s shoulder. “So, Dr. Oliver. How are your patients? Anybody die recently?” Reid gave him a look and Maddie put her head in her hands. Casey removed his arm. “Sorry…sometimes I say…well, just the wrong thing.”

Luke laughed. “You can say that again, Case.” Reid was drawn to the sound of Luke’s laugh and lifted his eyes to the young man, who smiled shyly at him.

 

 

 

They sat in silence, each with their own drink and thoughts.

Maddie was very fond of Luke; _perhaps I’m falling in-love with him, but I’m not sure. He is a very good dancer, and I enjoy his kisses, and he’s quite handsome – not to mention intelligent and kind and strong._ She peeked over at him, beside her – he was smiling at the doctor; _that's Luke – he’s always so welcoming of strangers._

Casey was watching Maddie – she had her eyes on Luke. _Is she in-love with him? Probably. What's not to love; he's so much better than me – kinder, stronger, smarter._ He saw the way she smiled as she watched Luke, and the way the light from the windows, filtered through the curtains, shining through her long, dark hair. His mouth fell open slightly as everyone else at the table seemed to fade.

Luke could feel Maddie watching him and he turned to smile at her. _She’s so beautiful - inside and out. What’s wrong with me? If she can't elicit the tug on my heart, who ever would?_ His gaze drifted across the table to Casey and he swallowed. Why was he continuing to have those dreams? He wished that he could have the uncomplicated friendship with Casey that they used to enjoy.

Reid looked briefly at Luke; he had thought about the boy a lot this past week, ever since they met that night. He had thought about Luke's words and his excitement around schooling; he had remembered his smile and the way his eyes had lit up. He had honestly hoped to see him again soon – hoped they could talk, that he could hear more about the books Luke loved so much. As he was recalling these thoughts, his eyes had found their way back to Luke's face, subconsciously studying the curve of his jaw line, the fullness of his lips, the way his eyes were so beautiful when he smiled. Suddenly Luke met his gaze and, like the night at the supper, Reid felt his breath stolen. Luke smiled at him and then his mouth fell open; then Luke swallowed and looked down and then back up, and then down again, confusion on his face.

Maddie broke the silence, which had only lasted about a minute, maybe less. “Luke, you must be very excited about next week.”

“Of course.” he said, genuinely pleased. “I've worked so hard. Not that it hasn't been enjoyable.”

“Even Mrs. Henderson and her reading list?” Casey asked.

“Oh, yes. That's been one of my favorite parts.”

“Help me, Doctor.” Casey made a mock-choking demonstration, leaning against Reid. Then sitting up, he added, “You must be joking, my boy. Her list will just about kill any sane man.”

“You know he's not, Casey.” Maddie interjected. “Stop teasing.”

“Oh, Lucas and his books.” he laid a hand over his own heart, dramatically. “Inseparable.”

“Lucas?” Reid said. “Is that your given name?”

“Yes, actually my proper name is _Lucas Christian Snyder_.” Reid enjoyed hearing the way Luke pronounced it the German way. “I was named after my two grandfathers, one of whom was German.”

“You love to read?”

“I do. I can't seem to get enough of it; fiction and nonfiction. And I love to write, although I'm not sure if I'm any good at it.”

“Of course you are, Luke. Everyone in class knows that – and even Mrs. Henderson has complimented you.”

“Well, just the once.”

“But that's more than anyone else, Luke.” Maddie insisted.

“Well, it's rather a moot point after all, isn't it?”

The three youth all nodded at each other, understanding.

“What is?” Reid asked.

“Whether or not Luke loves to read or write.” Casey said. “His family is very proud of him, but once he receives his diploma, he'll be expected to put his full effort into the farm, like we all will with our work once we finish school.”

Reid could see Luke nodding along with the rest – the light in his eyes diminishing – as if he had come to terms with this expectation. _Such was the life of a grown-up_ , Luke must be thinking.

“Have your parents said as much?” Reid asked.

“Well no, but...it's what everyone does, right? And then they get married and have children...and sure, there’ll be time to read some, but I won’t have the hours that I've had these last several years.” Reid could see it was like Luke was grieving his leaving school; and again, he doubted the boy knew it.

“Have you considered _continuing_ school?”

The three of them looked at him as if they'd never heard of the idea. And of course they had, but probably none of them had ever considered it.

“No.” Luke said. “I haven't.” And Reid could see the wheels of his mind turning, processing the strange possibility, as if a new planet had been discovered.

“You mean like...” Casey began. “...going to university?”

Reid nodded, looking briefly at Casey before returning his gaze to Luke's.

“But that would mean leaving Oakdale.” Maddie said.

Reid continued to hold Luke's gaze - the young man was looking at him as if he wasn't sure whether Reid's idea was a lifesaving one or one he would drown in.

After another moment's discomfort, Reid spoke again. “You will have to show me some of your writing sometime; I'd love to read it.”

“You would?”

“Of course, if you’re as good as Mrs. Henderson says,” he teased. And that earned him a smile from Luke.

“You're coming to the Snyder’s for Luke's party, right?” Casey asked. Reid nodded. “Well, I was going to go along early to help with the setups.”

“And I was as well.” Maddie added.

“Why don't we pick you up and bring you out there and you can read some of Luke's wonderful treasures while you wait.”

“Okay.” Reid said smiling at Casey and Maddie. “I'd like that.”

And with that they all rose form the table and the three youths headed towards the door.

Luke turned around and, hands in his pockets, he looked at Reid once more. “Dr. Oliver?”

Reid looked back at him and nodded.

“Thank you,” Luke said.

Reid wasn't sure what Luke was thanking him for exactly, but he was glad to have helped him. “You're welcome, Luke. Enjoy your last week before your diploma.”

More smiles were shared between the two, before Luke said. “I will. Goodbye.”

And then the doctor watched him walk out.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/


	9. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/  


**Chapter 9**

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Snyder.”

“Reid. Please call me Katie, at least when we’re here.”

“Alright.” He smiled as he sat at the table. “Is Jacob not joining us?”

“Can you believe he’s asleep? He was exhausted.” She began to serve the meal. “It’s been a long time since he’s taken a nap.”

“It’s just the two of us then?”

“Yes.” She smiled sweetly at him.

 

 

 

 

“And then Aaron _jumped_ off that roof, _right_ into the hay; it scared the daylights out of everyone, especially Lily, as you can imagine.”

Reid nodded. “I didn’t know about Aaron. I thought Luke was the oldest.”

“Oh no. But, of course, Luke’s had to play that role for a number of years now. He was…let’s see, Aaron moved away when he was sixteen, so Luke would have been twelve at the time. And, of course, Luke is so responsible, that he makes a better oldest son than Aaron ever has.”

Reid raised a questioning eyebrow.

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, Aaron’s a dear – we’ve always been close – but he’s a bit on the wild side. I hope someday a girl comes along who can keep up with him – someone who makes him want to settle down. Oh Reid!” She said excitedly. “He lives in Chicago – perhaps you’ve met him.”

“Well, there are a lot of people in the city, so…”

“That’s true. Oh Reid, you should hear some of the stories he tells me.”

“Really?” Reid said, ever amused by the simple things that entertained the people of this town.

“Of course you’re _from_ the city, so you probably wouldn’t be surprised, especially being a doctor; you’ve probably seen it all.”

“I do see a lot.”

“Every time I see him, he has a more and more wild tale to tell.”

Reid could tell that she was hoping he’d be begging to hear the gossip, and she seemed disappointed that he wasn’t.

“I wonder if you’ve seen…” she seemed hesitant, and he looked up. “Well, _Aaron_ says…that there are these men…” Reid swallowed, his eyes almost meeting hers. “Men who…are like women, who act like women…” he remained silent. “…or, rather, who are treated like women… _that_ way…I mean they, um…”

“I know what you mean.” He said somewhat coldly. “You mean in a sexual sense.”

She colored. “Um, yes. That’s it.” She took a quick drink and looked away.

Reid looked at her and then she met his gaze.

“Do you _understand_ it, Reid? Aaron has said that he’s seen them – these men – two of them together, sometimes one dressed very much like a woman – going in and out of these clubs. And they dance together, evidently, just like a couple would. And then they go home together; I can only imagine what they do once there.”

Reid had been a party to many such conversations – especially as a doctor – and each and every time he had to intentionally distance himself from it, make it professional, not personal. “What is it that you want to understand, Mrs. Snyder?”

“I know that I made light of it, earlier, and I know they’re strangers to me, but I simply can’t help but feel concern for them.”

“What do you mean, concern?”

“Well, those poor souls, living in such confusion. Homosexuals, Aaron says they’re called; he’s spoken with them.” She put her hands together. “Can you imagine? I can’t. I simply _can’t_ imagine speaking with one of them myself.”

He took a deep breath and silently let it out. “Go on.”

“Well, Aaron believes that they’re not confused about being men, that they know they are indeed men. He says that their confusion lies in wanting to be treated like a woman or…I suppose…” she blushed. “I suppose for some it is the opposite confusion. But either way, they want to _know_ another man…biblically.”

“What if they’re not confused?”

“What?” She looked at him as if he hadn’t been listening properly. “Of course they are; I only wish there were a way to help. But what could I do, all the way out here?”

Ignoring her assumption that the ‘problem’ existed solely in the city, he asked, “And what kind of help would you offer, if you were able?”

“Well, I’m not sure I’d be qualified, but perhaps just listening to them would help. I’m not sure what would be the cause of such confusion. What does the medical profession say?”

“That it is a disorder of the brain.”

“Oh.” And then she frowned. “Does that mean that there is no help…no cure?”

“According to many doctors, there are therapies…of various kinds.” This was getting very difficult for Reid. He felt as if he were under a microscope, even though nobody knew he was there.

“So, there is hope?” She looked relieved. “Oh good.” And then her eyes seemed to drift off for a minute, and a small chuckle escaped her lips.

He looked up at her.

“Poor Luke.” She said.

He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean, ‘poor Luke’?”

“Oh, I’m remembering an incident which happened a while back.” Reid looked on, so she continued. “Luke was having lunch with Aaron and I, and Aaron decided it was a good time to share some of his stories. I think he thought it would be fun to shock his younger brother, and boy did he ever!”

Reid swallowed, very concerned now. “What happened?”

“God, the poor thing…this was last summer. Luke turned white as a sheet.” She smiled fondly. “I’m sure he’d never imagined such things.”

“What did Aaron say…exactly?”

“Oh, he was talking about these men _knowing_ each other, _being_ together. And Luke, of course, hadn’t a clue what Aaron was talking about. All of his brother’s chosen phrases simply went over Luke’s head…he’s quite innocent you see, especially compared to his older brother. Anyway, since Luke wasn’t understanding the true meaning of his words, Aaron thought he ought to be more blunt. And, well, I can’t repeat the words he said, but he was pretty frank about what the two men might do when they were alone…” here Katie began to blush and giggle. “Anyway, poor Luke looked about to die of embarrassment or something, and he excused himself from the table for several minutes.”

“Have you talked to Luke about this since then?”

“Oh gosh no, of course not. The poor dear was already embarrassed enough. And probably terrified by it. I mean, what young lad wouldn’t feel…well, both terrified and disgusted by the idea.” She waved a hand and began to clear the table. “Anyway, I think Aaron talked with him later, just to make sure he wasn’t…you know, scarred by the conversation.” She went to pick up Reid’s plate and hesitated, “Oh, I’m sorry. You’re not finished, are you?”

“No, I’m done. Thank you.”

“But Reid, you’ve hardly eaten.”

“I know…I’ve just got a lot on my mind tonight. I’m not that hungry.”

“How about dessert? Pie?”

He shook his head. “Thank you, but no. I’ve actually got some work I have to do. So, I’ll say good night.”

Reid ascended the stars to his room, Katie’s words echoing in his mind. _One of them…these men…poor souls…_

He knew that her intentions were good, but oh how he longed for the day when he wouldn’t feel like such an outsider, such an other. And poor Luke, indeed. Based upon Katie’s description of his reactions to his brother’s tales, complied with the confused looks he had received from the young man himself these past weeks, Reid wondered if Luke was also like him. He’d had his suspicions, but had thought maybe it was simply his own attraction to the boy that was clouding his judgment.

_What young lad wouldn’t feel… terrified and disgusted by the idea?_

The same thing - the same words - repeated over and over, from different people in different times, over the course of Reid’s thirty years – and they still got to him. Not as much as when he was younger; he’d developed a pretty tough skin, but not impenetrable. He pulled on a light sweater and headed out of the house, walking out of town, towards the Hughes. Once there he saddled up Peppercorn, and headed farther out, beginning at a slow pace and working up to a canter, memories ringing through his ears.

_“I could have you barred from medicine in this city – hell, in this state – with just the drop of a word.”_

_“And you’d resort to that, simply because you’re not good enough to compete with me, fair and square?”_

_“Without a moments hesitation.” Dr. Pierson stepped closer to him._

_“Have you no pride?”_

_“What I have are patients and a successful practice. And you’re on my turf, Dr. Oliver.” He crossed arms over his chest. “Leave Chicago, oh for a few years maybe, and I won’t breathe a word.”_

_“You dirty hypocrite. How dare you? At least Hills and I aren’t cheating on anyone. What say I drop by and pay your wife a little visit?”_

_“She’d get over it…eventually. And, more importantly, so would my patients.” Reid shook his head, and Pierson continued. “Look, I don’t care who you – or Hills, for that matter – sleep with, as disgusting as the thought is. You do what you want, just go be a doctor somewhere else. This spot is taken.”_

_“And if I don’t?”_

_“One word. That’s all it would take, and not only would your patients come running back to me, but you’d be barred from practicing.”_

He rode on faster, over a hilly area, through some woods, and down over the other side. Spotting a brook in the distance, he headed in that direction. And a more distant memory came to him, as clear as day.

_His ass felt the stretching as it accommodated Charles’ full member, the older boy’s lips sucking on his neck, as his thrusts began to speed up. Reid’s one hand pressed against the wall in front of him as his other sped up on his own demanding manhood. And as he felt his body being filled with warm wetness, he came over his own hand._

_They both collapsed beside each other, on the floor of the abandoned classroom. “Oh, I am going to miss this very much.”_

_Reid curled close to him. “What do you mean, Charles?” he mumbled, sated. They had been meeting quite regularly this semester._

_“I mean after my marriage.”_

_“You’re…you’re getting married?”_

_“Of course I am. To Catherine, right before I head to medical school. Wake up, my boy.” He ruffled Reid’s hair._

_“But…I thought.”_

_“What? What did you think?”_

_Reid looked up at him with his big blue eyes._

_“Did you think that just because we have a little fun together, that I wasn’t still going to marry her?”_

_“Fun? Is that all…all this is…was to you?”_

_He pulled Reid close. “Well, no of course not. You know I care about you. More than any of the others before you. But, I’m not like Johansen and neither are you; we’re normal, Reid. I’ll marry Catherine, and I’m sure that someday you’ll marry as well, my dear boy. Just give it time – you’ll find the right girl.”_

_And leaning his head back against the boards of the wall, Reid doubted that was true._

He urged Peppercorn over one last small hill and then rode along the water’s edge, a third scenario reshaping in his mind’s eye.

_“What’s this?” his father spat._

_Reid and Matthew jumped apart and began to frantically tuck in their deflating erections._

_“Answer me, son.”_

_Reid wasn’t sure how to answer. He stood in front of his father, feet away from his best friend, wide eyes looking at the ground._

_“Look at me when I’m speaking to you.” Reid looked up into his father’s disgusted gaze, and he thought he might be sick._

_“Yes, Father.” He said. His dad looked up and down his body, as if trying to recognize who he was. Then he suddenly shook his head, and said, “You will never do this again.” Then his father turned towards Matthew. “Myers, go home. I never want to see you here again.” Matthew looked at Reid and bit his lip; Reid could tell he might cry. He nodded his head slightly – trying to convey to Matthew that he was still his best friend._

_After the boy was gone, his father’s gaze returned to him. “You are never to be alone with him again, do you understand?”_

_“Yes, sir.”_

_“And we will never speak of this to anyone, especially your mother.” Then his voice became softer as he approached Reid. “Son, this will pass. Fourteen is a little old to still be experimenting like this but, I do believe this will pass.” He laid a comforting hand on Reid’s shoulder. “There’s nothing wrong with you. You’ll be alright.”_

_And then his father walked away towards the house._

_Just ten minutes before, Reid had thought he’d found heaven. He’d never felt anything so good as Matthew touching him like that; and then their lips had met and Reid had been sure he’d found heaven. But his father’s voice seemed to very clearly indicate that what they had found was more like Hell. Would it pass? Did he want it to? He wanted his father to never look at him with disgust again; but, he had to admit, he wanted that heavenly feeling again._

 

Reid dismounted and tied the horse loosely near the water’s edge, and then he stood with his back against a tree and looked up through the canopy, wondering if the voices, the message, would ever change. Would he never belong? Would he always be judged or pitied? And would he ever find love – real love? Was such a thing even possible for a man like him – a homosexual?

 

 

 

“Dr. Oliver?”

Reid looked up from the ground where he was sitting, into the handsome face of young Luke, who was looking not-so-young and oh-so-handsome astride his horse.

Luke climbed down and walked up beside him. “Good afternoon,” he said, and then he reached out a hand to Reid’s mount. “Hey there, Peppercorn.” She nuzzled his hand. “I forgot Casey said you were riding her. That’s good; she’s been a bit ignored ever since he got Chester.”

Reid watched Luke touch the horse and felt his own heart lighten just a bit; _what was it about the boy that made everything seem a little easier?_ Luke turned to him and smiled when their eyes met, and Reid inhaled quietly. “So,” he cleared his throat. “How have your last few days before graduation been?”

“Good.” Luke smiled. “Very good. Exams are through; I’ve been helping my dad a lot more; it feels good to be using my body more – I love that about spring.” His eyes found Reid’s and he chuckled. “Of course…come the fall and I’ll be dieing to open my books again.” Reid couldn’t help the smile that came to his lips.

“That’s good. Do you like that balance?”

Luke waited for clarification.

“The physical labor of the farm with the intellectual labor of your books.”

Luke slowly nodded. “Yeah, I do. I think that’s what I’d like to do…if I had my way…” a small smile came to him as he looked off in the distance a bit. “Farming and writing.”

“Who says you can’t…have your way, I mean?”

“Nobody, I guess.” He looked at Reid shrewdly. “I’ve just never considered that I could. I’ve never known a farmer, including my dad who’s very smart, who was much of a bookworm, like I am.”

“Well, you must be one of a kind.” And he winked at Luke, who smiled that sweet shy smile of his.

They spoke some more and eventually began to walk with their horses. “So, this is the big weekend. I hope you enjoy it.”

“Thank you, Dr. Oliver. You’ll be there, right?”

Reid nodded. “I will – I’m looking forward to it.”

“Um,” Luke began. “When I arrived, you didn’t see me at first. I was watching you, for a minute; I’m sorry.” Reid raised his eyebrows at him and Luke looked away.

“That’s okay, Luke.”

Luke’s smile was small and then he continued with what was on his mind. “You seemed troubled.”

Reid met his eyes again. “I was.”

Luke silently looked at him and Reid found himself continuing to speak. “I’d just had a disturbing conversation…and it stirred up some memories.”

Luke gazed sweetly at him. “Would it help to tell me about it?”

Reid was amazed and grateful; here was this _young_ man – boy still in a way – offering to help him, the grown up. He shook his head with a smile. “Not…yet, Luke.” The beautiful young man looked at him curiously. “Spending time with you, however…has helped.” Reid went on, and then he wondered if he should have kept silent, for the comment seemed fairly inappropriate.

“I’m not sure why.” Luke said with a smile. “I didn’t really say much.”

“Somehow, you don’t need to.”

Reid watched as Luke’s breath came in and then went out. “I’m glad.” He said with a blush. “That it helped, I mean.”

Each moment that Reid spent with Luke confirmed his suspicions about the young man’s sexuality. Right now, he believed that he understood it better than Luke did himself. Luke probably had no idea of the way he was looking at Reid.

“Shall we ride a bit?” Reid asked.

Luke nodded, they mounted up, and began to head out, parting ways at the first hill, where Luke went towards home and Reid towards town.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/


	10. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/  
  
 **Chapter 10 - Graduation Day**

On the drive to the Snyder’s farm, Reid was sitting in a very interesting position. Beside him was Maddie and across from them were Henry and Casey. He wasn’t too surprised to find Henry’s eyes upon him frequently – the man was becoming far too attached for Reid’s liking. But far more interesting was the way that Casey was watching Maddie. The boy was in-love, with the girl his best friend was courting. And Reid wasn’t sure that the feelings weren’t returned, at least in part. He could sense Maddie brighten as Casey spoke to her, looked at her.

Reid looked to Henry, to see how this might affect him – she being his little sister, and all. But Henry only seemed to have eyes for him. Oh boy, it was bad enough feeling that Katie was falling for him, but Henry? He simply didn’t need the man he was sleeping with to go falling for him as well. Fortunately, at least, since Maddie and Casey were in their own little world, neither of them noticed Henry’s doe eyes.

What a funny little foursome. Casey, in love with his best friend’s girl; Maddie, not entirely indifferent to it; her brother, possibly falling in love with him; and Reid? Well, he was unsure of how he felt, but he knew he was very much looking forward to seeing Luke today. And none of them…not a one…could voice aloud how they were feeling.

 

 

When they arrived at the farm, Casey showed Reid around, almost like he was showing off his own home. It was obvious he’d spent a lot of time with the Snyders. They spoke briefly with Mrs. Snyder and Luke’s siblings before they were both asked to come outside and help put up the small tent that had been borrowed from the church. Stepping outside, he saw that Henry was already attempting to help Luke, Holden, and another handsome young man who Reid was sure must be Aaron – he appeared a little older, and a lot more confident, than Luke. During the twenty minutes that it took for the six men to erect the poles, stretch the canvas tenting into place, and stake the ropes, he discovered that he was indeed Lily and Holden’s oldest. When the task was completed, they were introduced; He seemed like a good man. He watched Aaron put an arm around Luke’s shoulder – saw Luke look at his older brother. They obviously had a good relationship.

But Reid couldn’t forget his conversation with Katie; Aaron’s tales of homosexuality in Chicago, that he’d passed on to Luke, had obviously shaken Luke up. He felt twin surges of anger and protectiveness – like he wanted to be the shield that stood between Luke and anything that could hurt him. Watching them now, he didn’t think that Aaron would ever intentionally hurt Luke, but he might do so without thinking.

 

 

 

Graduation day was really a graduation weekend, it seemed. Thursday evening there had been a Baccalaureate service in the church – everyone was there. Friday evening – last night – had been the graduation ceremony, outside in the field beside the school, and again everyone was there. There had followed a brief celebration; some musicians had played and cookies and lemonade had been shared by all, right there in the field. Today, the members of the small graduating class were celebrating with their families and closest friends at their homes.

Today was a very special occasion for the Snyder family and everyone had been hard at work for weeks preparing something special for the day. Lily and Emma had prepared special foods and new linens for the tables; Faith and Casey had composed songs and poems to commemorate the day; Natalie and Ethan had picked and arranged flowers in bloom, and vases of them graced several tables; Holden had crafted a satchel of soft leather for Luke’s books and writings; Maddie had embroidered a beautiful, soft cotton shirt for Luke to wear that day. Aaron had brought several new novels from a bookstore in Chicago. Other friends and family members would arrive with their warm wishes and hugs, delicious food to grace the table, their smiles and laughter, their pride in Luke’s accomplishment.

“Luke, this is your day. You need to stop working so hard.” Casey said. “Let us finish the preparations. You go and relax; show Dr. Oliver your writing. Or the horses.” He added with a smile.

Reid waited for Luke to meet his gaze. “Alright.” Luke said. “If you’d like that.”

“I would.” Reid said. “Very much.”

Luke’s hands went into his pockets and he looked at the ground for a moment before lifting his eyes to Reid’s again. “Which would you like to do?”

“Both.” Reid said decisively.

“Okay.” Luke said with a small smile. “Horses first then.”  
  
Luke showed Reid the barn, introducing him to Ginger, the mare he rode exclusively when he was younger. He’d already met Seamus, Luke’s regular mount now. Reid was quiet, simply looking and saying hello with a gentle touch as Luke introduced him to each of the other animals.

Then they went inside the house and had an early taste of the fresh lemonade. Reid settled on the porch while Luke went to retrieve some of his writings. He came back and with a shy glance at Reid, placed the papers and journal on the table in front of him. “Are you sure you want to read them?”

“Are they _that_ bad?” Reid teased.

“No, of course they aren’t. I just…don’t know that they’re terrific.”

“They probably won’t kill me though.”

“No.” Luke smiled and blushed.

“Then I’ll risk it.” Reid said with a wink.

Luke paced and watched nervously, until Reid lifted his eyes to him and looked at him. “Sorry,” the young man said and then sat down beside him.

 

 

 

Twenty minutes passed and Dr. Oliver was still reading. Luke watched him. Everyone in his life had praised his writing – from his parents to his best friends. But only his teacher had ever before spent this much time really reading it. Dr. Oliver’s face would go from mildly amused to eyes raised in curiosity to furrowed confusion before nodding his head in understanding.

After a while, Luke stopped noticing the older man’s reactions to what he was reading and began to simply notice his beautiful features. His soft auburn curls that Luke itched to touch, his inquisitive blue eyes which spoke so much, his jaw line and neck and the outline of his defined chest which Luke could only imagine; lifting his gaze, his eyes landed on the doctor’s lips and Luke was transfixed. He felt his heart begin to race and he licked his own lips and swallowed. Then his head began to clear and he looked away for a moment, willing himself to calm down.

“Luke,” Dr. Oliver’s voice urgently spoke. He raised his eyes, wondering if he had been caught staring a moment before. Reid smiled at him. “Maddie and Casey were right. And so was your teacher.”

“You think it’s good?”

“Yes, very good. All of it.” Reid began to pick up various pieces. “Some are better than others, for instance this one here, I can really feel his struggle when he is leaving. You made it so real. And this one…was this your horse?” Luke nodded his head. “Beautiful…very moving.” Luke thought his heart might burst, he was so happy.

Reid put down the papers and looked intently at him. “Luke.” He said. “Have you _considered_ more schooling? I mean, you’re already very good but…do you think you would enjoy it?”

“University, you mean?” Reid nodded. “Do you really think I’m good enough?”

“You are, Luke. Don’t underestimate yourself.” Reid said. “But it wouldn’t make sense to go if you didn’t want to be there.”

Luke bit his lip. “Honestly, the thought of leaving home…” his brow furrowed. “Is sad…and a bit terrifying.” He exhaled. “But the thought of being able, being required even, to spend hours every day writing, of having someone really good critiquing and helping me improve…” he inhaled and smiled. “Sounds…incredible. More than I’ve ever hoped for.” His brow furrowed again. “Too good to be true.”

Reid instinctively reached out and took his hand. The moment felt so natural that Luke held his in return and they held each other’s gaze. “It’s not, Luke. It’s not.” And there went Luke’s heart again.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/


	11. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!  
 **Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/  
  
 **Ch 11**

_Boy, this really was an all-day celebration_ , Reid thought. He’d arrived at noon to help with set-ups and read Luke’s work, and here it was almost nine O’clock and, while most of the guests had gone home, there was still this little gathering of nine; the Snyders, all except the three younger ones, Katie, Henry, Maddie, Casey, and himself. They all sat in the living room by the fire, talking and laughing, while Holden and Casey plucked out a little improv on Scollay’s Reel.

Reid was tired and wasn’t contributing much to the conversation, instead content to watch the others. Most of the people sat on hardback chairs – all except for Luke, Maddie and Katie, who occupied the small sofa. Lily seemed tired but very happy; Katie was very much enjoying the social situation; Aaron was busy regaling them all with funny anecdotes, which was making Henry somewhat jealous. And although there was a tiredness in the room, it was laced with joy, and nobody in this small band seemed inclined to see the evening come to an end.

Reid could have been content to leave, but since he knew that it would be easier to simply wait until his ride was ready to go, he let his tired eyes fall on his favorite subject in the room, for just a minute. Always, his eyes went first to Luke’s _face_ , taking in his eyes and cheekbones, his jaw and lips; moving on to his soft hair and down his neck, admiring his broad shoulders and strong arms, down to his hands, which had seen both the pen and the plow. They rested on his thighs; a smaller hand tentatively reached out to take his, and Reid watched as Luke turned his head towards Maddie and smiled softly at her, gently taking her hand in his own; then the young man looked back down and his smile seemed to falter.

It had been quite a day. The feasting had begun at two, and boy did they feast. Katie wasn’t lying about Emma’s cooking; Reid hadn’t tasted so many delicious casseroles and salads and pies, oh the pies…in years. And then the festivities had begun, with gifts given and speeches and songs sung; Reid smiled recalling how many times Luke had smiled and blushed and given big strong hugs of thank you. After that there had been games in the field and some of the younger folk had gone for a swim, although it was a chilly one to be sure, as the weather had cooled off in the last couple weeks. And before you knew it, it was time to eat again; oh, Reid could live like this. All that and the gathering had been large enough that people didn’t pay him too much mind, which was just how he liked it.

After supper, many people had gone home and Luke’s younger siblings had been put to bed, and before he knew it, it was just this little gathering right here. Being a good listener, he’d learned a lot about Luke’s family and close friends. It seemed that both Henry and Aaron were pretty close to Katie growing up, even though Aaron was three years younger than the other two. He’d always liked running with the older crowd.

Nobody had been surprised when Aaron had left school after the eighth grade – it was what Katie and Henry had done three years earlier – it was what most people did, if they made it that far. Reid hadn’t been surprised to hear it either; it was pretty common, both in the small towns and the city. If Lily and Holden hadn’t been surprised, however, they had been a bit disappointed. They were indeed proud of him, but Aaron was a very bright boy, and they’d hoped that he would have continued on farther. Holden himself had left school when he was twelve; the Civil War had sent his older brothers off to fight and he was needed on the farm. Lily had finished eighth grade – highly unusual for a girl at the time, but she’d come from a family of money and one that also valued formal education, both for boys and girls.

It had surprised no one when her family had tried to keep Lily from marrying Holden. Neither family – the Walsh’s or the Snyder’s had been very happy with the young, budding romance between the two, but it was love and there was no standing in its way, so ultimately the Walsh’s allowed their daughter to marry the farm boy and the Snyders allowed their son to marry the girl from that snobbish family. Both had given their blessing.

Looking at the two of them now, Holden with his fiddle resting on his knee and one arm draped behind her shoulder, Lily laughing and smiling at the conversation around her, no one would know of their tempestuous beginnings. They looked the picture of an easy, happy life. No wonder Luke had the attitude that bad times would always get better, that life was good. He had every reason to believe that.

Holden leaned in close to whisper something in his wife’s ear. She smiled at him.

“Well, I think that we’ll leave you young folks to it; we’re going to retire.” Taking her hand they began to leave. “Make yourselves at home, however, don’t feel the need to rush off.”

Lily paused to give Luke one more kiss. “We’re so proud of you, Son. Enjoy tonight.” And they left the room.

“So, tell us more about the big city, Aaron.” Henry said. “You’ve been there six years now, you must have settled in. You’ve found work you enjoy, right?”

“I’m doing construction right now; have been for a year and a half, and I really like it.” Aaron’s smile was warm and genuine. “There’s a lot of building going on, and I’m good at it. Gives me a nice salary, with a lot of free time in the colder months.”

“And I’m sure you take advantage of that, if the stories I hear are true.” Casey winked at him. Lily and Holden hadn’t been too pleased of Aaron’s reputation as being quite the ladies’ man.

“Well, I’m only human; what’s a man to do, surrounded by so many lovely women?” And he gestured to the women in the room. “No offense to the lovely women right here in Oakdale.”

“None taken.” Katie replied.

“But _you’re_ from the city…” Aaron said, turning to Reid, who had been perfectly content to just listen to the conversation.

“Well, that’s where I’ve lived for the last ten years or so.”

“But you can attest to the beautiful women…the temptation.” He smiled knowingly at Reid.

He smiled politely at Luke’s older brother, but said nothing.

“But some of the men aren’t interested in the ladies…that’s what you said.” Katie spoke, and then added, “I was telling Reid about that a few days ago. Since he’s a doctor, I thought he might have some light to shed on it.” She said as way of explanation.

 

“And do you?” Aaron asked Reid.

Reid silently looked between Aaron and Katie, and then took in Henry’s wide eyes.

Katie spoke. “Dr. Oliver said that it was a disorder of the brain. Isn’t that right?”

Reid hated keeping silent on his own beliefs, but he hadn’t been here in Oakdale very long, and he wasn’t ready to again be run out on a rail quite yet. “That’s what the medical community believes.” Reid said, but still, his gut churned.

Aaron was very astute however. “Is that what _you_ believe?”

Reid couldn’t outright lie. “No.” he said.

Katie’s brow furrowed. “But, I thought…”

Casey interrupted. “What are you talking about?”

“Men who aren’t… _interested_ in ladies.” Katie said with a blush. Casey didn’t appear to understand what she was talking about. “You know…” She nodded her head back and forth.

“No, I don’t know…” he said with a half-goofy smile. “That’s why I’m asking.”

Maddie took his arm. “Casey…in _that_ way.” She looked at the others, defending Casey’s naiveté. “You can’t blame him for not knowing. Casey’s never been to the city.”

Light seemed to dawn on Luke’s best friend, and his eyebrows rose, then they furrowed. “Really?”

“You’ve never heard of such a thing, Casey?” Aaron asked.

Casey shook his head.

“I hadn’t either until you mentioned it.” Katie defended.

“Yes, but you’re a girl.”

She gave him an offended look.

“Well, it’s just that boys tend to know more about these things. But he’s young, and who can blame him.” And Aaron looked around the room at all the men. “I’m sure no young man would want to spend much time thinking about _that_.”

And almost everyone laughed.

“No, I wouldn’t.” Casey said. “But…are you sure?” and he looked to Luke’s older brother for confirmation.

“Quite sure, I’ve talked to some them myself.”

“But, why? I mean, why are they like that?”

“That’s what I want to know.” Katie said with enthusiasm. “And I want to know what we can do to help them.”

Aaron laughed. “Well, I hardly think we’re going to solve that dilemma tonight, Katie dear.”

“No, you’re right.” she agreed. “And besides, tonight is a night of celebration. Casey, would you play us another song and would you sing? You have such a lovely voice. How about…hmmm, what shall it be?”

“The Flower of Magherally O.” Maddie said. “I love it when you sing that one… _She’s the girl that I adore_ …” Maddie quoted.

Casey began to play and then to sing and all eyes were on the young Hughes boy.

All eyes except two pairs. Luke’s gaze was on the floor and Reid’s was on him. He could see Luke’s chest heaving, his one hand anxiously pushing and pulling on his other thumb; Reid could feel how close Luke was to falling apart. He sat across the small room from him and he wished he could walk over to him and hold him.

In a moment, Luke stood up quietly. Casey kept on playing and singing. Maddie looked up at him questioningly and he nodded his head to say he was okay. He bent down to whisper something to her and as he walked out of the room, her reassured gaze fell back on Casey.

But Reid knew he wasn’t okay. And after a minute, he quietly excused himself as well.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/


	12. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!  
 **Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/

  
**Chapter 12**

Reid headed towards the barn; he thought that that was where Luke would go – to see his horses. He wasn’t sure what he was going to say to the boy, but he simply couldn’t sit in that room any longer knowing that Luke was out here hurting or confused.

He’d been right; he saw Luke in the lamplight, standing just inside one of the stalls, rubbing Ginger’s nose, and speaking quietly to her. Reid cleared his throat, and Luke looked up, startled and a bit frightened. When his eyes met Reid’s, a myriad of emotions seemed to pass over them; Reid saw Luke’s fear that he had revealed too much; next he saw Luke’s eyes take him in; lastly he saw concern furrow his brow again.

Reid wanted, again, to step up and hold the young man.

Luke stood taller, seeming to pull himself together for the sake of appearances; a part of Reid wanted to tell him to stop – that he didn’t need to pretend, not with him. But really…if Reid wasn’t ready to tell the truth about himself, how could he expect Luke to be ready? So he stood and watched as Luke put up his guard, pretended that everything was okay.

“What are _you_ doing out here, Dr. Oliver?”

Reid scratched the back of his head. “I just needed some fresh air…stretch my legs.”

Luke looked at him, as if assessing whether or not he was telling the truth. “I just needed to check in on the horses for the night.”

Reid nodded, sure that Holden had already done that just a couple hours ago, but allowing Luke to hold onto his story none-the-less. “It was quite a party; quite a day.” He allowed himself to smile at the young man. “I’m glad I came.”

“Me too.” Luke smiled, and Reid was amazed both by how quickly Luke could lower his guard and by his own reaction to that smile. And for a moment they both simply held each other’s gaze, until Luke looked away. “Thank you…for reading my work.”

Reid nodded his head. “It was my pleasure, Luke. Really – thank you for sharing it with me.” He took a step closer to the beautiful boy, before realizing it and backing off. Looking at Luke’s face, the young man seemed to assess him – like a million questions were going through his head.

“So, I suppose you’ll be heading off soon – back to town.”

Reid nodded.

“Dr. Oliver?” Reid met his gaze. “Do you know how…the other day you said…well, you were feeling down, and you said that…” he hesitated.

“I said that being with you had made me feel better.” Reid stated and Luke nodded, blushing.

“Well, thank you for coming out here…I know it wasn’t just for the fresh air…”

Reid nodded slightly.

“Well, it made me feel better, so…thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Luke.” And again Reid had to resist stepping closer and holding him, but these words did slip out. “Maybe we should do it more often.”

Luke silently questioned him.

“I mean, if it makes you feel better and me as well…” Reid babbled, not quite believing he was actually saying these things.

Luke laughed quietly. “I’d like to. Spend more time together, I mean. Friends do that. Not that we’re friends, I mean, I’m just a kid, but…”

“You’re not _just_ a kid, Luke.” They both smiled at each other. “And I do think we’re becoming friends.”

Luke inhaled and then let it out. “Would you like to ride together? Sometime this week.”

Reid nodded.

“How about Wednesday – midday?”

“Sure.” Reid said. “I’ll come out here; it’s so beautiful.”

“Sounds…wonderful.” Luke said.

 

 

As they walked back towards the house together, they fell in step beside each other. Reid hadn’t felt so comfortable in another human being’s presence in many years. _Matthew_ , he thought. _This was how it was with Matthew before that night_. After that night, when Reid’s father had discovered them in their barn, he and his best friend had continued to spend time together, despite Reid’s father’s wishes. They’d been secretive about it, however, and they’d never touched each other again like they had that night. And slowly, they’d drifted apart, the weight of everything unspoken becoming too much for them. And eventually Matthew had married Suzanne, and as Reid saw how miserable Matthew and his wife were, he’d left town, found his way into university and he’d avoided best friends after that.

But Luke was different; he was much younger than Reid, for one thing. That knowledge made Reid want to be very careful about where this friendship went; he felt responsible in a way he hadn’t quite felt with Matthew. But Reid also sensed courage in Luke that Matthew hadn’t had. When Reid thought about it, Luke was more courageous than any of the supposedly _adult_ men Reid had known. Reid had a lot of respect for Luke already, in the few weeks since they’d met.

As he thought these things his eyes drifted over to look at the young man beside him. In his expressive eyes and lips, in his strong profile, Reid could see that much wisdom had already been acquired in his short life. Luke turned to him suddenly, as they continued walking, and smiled at him; and that smile - full of innocence – caught Reid’s breath and he smiled back.

“There you are!” Maddie’s voice cried out from across the yard. “We weren’t sure where you two had wandered off to.”

Luke put his hands in his pockets as she, Henry and Casey approached. And Reid looked at him and then down at the ground. “I needed some fresh air.” Reid pulled out his story.

“Yeah.” Luke smiled at him. “And I wanted to check on the horse once more.” And then he turned towards the little group. “So, are you off?”

“Yes.” Maddie smiled at him. “It’s been a wonderful day, Luke. We’re all so proud of you.”

“Yeah, Luke.” Casey said, giving him a bear hug. “Great job.” He smiled sincerely at Luke. “We’ll wait for you at the carriage, Maddie. Don’t be long.”

Reid let himself be led away by Casey, but when they got to Henry’s carriage, he couldn’t resist turning around.

Maddie and Luke were standing close together and he had his hands on her waist. He leaned in and gave her a kiss, lingering a bit. Then he stepped back and as she walked towards Reid and Casey, his eyes met Reid’s briefly, before they both looked down.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/


	13. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!  
 **Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/  
  
 **Chapter 13**

As the weeks went on, Reid and Luke spent many hours together. They rode a lot and sometimes took along a picnic. Reid shared with Luke about his research at Memorial; Luke shared with him the books he was most excited about, and he continued to write and share that with the older man.

Lily and Holden looked on, so glad of the friendship; Luke often seemed a little like a lost sheep – always kind of different from everyone else in town. They knew he’d long admired Dr. Hughes, being such a learned and thoughtful man. But here, suddenly, was someone a little closer to Luke’s age; someone Luke could really relate to. Someone who could understand Luke’s love of books and writing.

They also noticed that Luke was spending a little less time with Maddie; they were still officially a couple, but perhaps she wasn’t the one. That was all right; there was no rush. Luke was happy, and that was what mattered to them.

Maddie, for her part, was spending quite a bit more time with Casey. Nobody seemed to notice this, not her brother Henry, not even Luke; Maddie and Casey had always been close – part of the magnificent threesome known as Luke, Casey, and Maddie. Reid noticed, however. He often saw them walking together in town, talking about this, that, and everything in-between. All seemed innocent; Reid doubted that the two of them even noticed how much time they were spending together.

Reid wondered whether or not anybody _really_ noticed how much time he and Luke were spending together.

 

 

 

 

 

“When he takes her hand, and says that he has to leave…that their love must remain pure?” Luke sat up on the picnic blanket and looked at him outrageously. “You don’t love that part? When he says that in another life, in another time, they will love each other, forever…for eternity?”

Luke’s beautiful brown eyes were looking at him as if he _must_ understand this. “Okay, Luke. For you I love it.” And then he laughed.

“No, no. It can’t be like that. You can’t love it for me.” And he looked up to the sky as if trying to figure out how to explain algebra to a math-moron. “Oh, how can I make you see?”

“You can’t, Luke.” Reid took a bite of his peach. “God, these are good.” He said. “No, you see, Luke. I just disagree.”

“What?” Luke said, distracted by the juice running down Reid’s chin.

Reid watched the movement of Luke’s eyes before he continued. “He left her with _that man_. Out of nobleness? To keep their love pure? What’s so pure about leaving her to her misery? Life with a man who only half loves her. Would you settle for that?”

Luke pondered.

“Would you be grateful to a man who asked - no insisted - that you settle for that?”

“God.” Luke sat up straighter. “I’d never thought of it that way before.”

“How we love each other _here, now_ is what counts, Luke.” And he held the young man’s gaze. “Don’t you think?”

 

 

 

 

 

Spring turned into full-blown summer, and Luke didn’t remember when he’d felt so happy. He was writing like he’d never written before, with a renewed energy and passion. His time spent with his family was even better than it already used to be. He had a new confidence about himself - he was seriously beginning to consider the idea of going to university. He friendships with both Maddie and Casey were feeling…well, different but better somehow. He was spending far more time with Reid than with either of them, but his feelings towards Casey were starting to find their way back to how they had been – without any of those other feelings. Although, now he was starting to get those funny feelings for Reid; perhaps it was a phase that he went through with everyone he became close to.

He dismounted in front of Henry’s pub; he was meeting Maddie there for a soda. As he tied Seamus up, he heard a familiar voice. “Hello Luke.”

He smiled and turned around. “Dr. Oliver.” He exhaled. “What are you doing here?”

“Was home for lunch, and I’m on my way back to work.” They looked at each other silently for a beat. “What are you doing here?”

“Meeting Maddie for a soda.” He said shyly, inclining his head towards the pub.

“I’ll walk you over…if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.” Luke’s heart beat strong in his chest.

“Tell me…what are you reading now?”

Luke smiled and told him a bit about it, and which were his favorite parts and why. Before they knew it, they’d reached the pub.

“Well, here we are.” Luke said.

Reid stopped and nodded. “Is Maddie here already?”

Luke and he both peered into the window and there she was, at a table with Casey. “Oh, I didn’t know Casey was joining us.” Luke said. They looked again and both noticed that Maddie and Casey weren’t talking, but were just staring at each other; that went on for a good ten seconds or so before Maddie dropped her gaze and blushed and then so did Casey. “Oh…well.” Luke began. “Um…”

Reid remained silent, just standing there beside him.

“Well, I guess I’ll go in.” Luke said.

“Okay.” Reid said. As Luke began to walk away from him, Reid called him.

Luke turned around again.

“Will we meet tomorrow? So I could see your latest poems?”

Luke smiled, feeling his happiness slowly seeping back in. “Yes. See you tomorrow.”

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/


	14. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/  
 **A/N** : When we were last in nineteenth-century Oakdale, Casey and Maddie were getting closer, both Katie and Henry had eyes for Reid, and he and Luke were becoming good friends. Sorry it's taken so long for me to post, but between my BB and RL and my procrastinatory nature (I know that's not really a word), this is what happened.

  
**Chapter 14**

Every summer there was a celebration of the founding of the town. And every year it managed to be sunny and warm; this year was no exception. There would be baked goods and beautiful crafts and wares on display and for sale. Farmers would bring their best animals and produce to show off and auction. There would be music and children running every which way. It was a day everyone in town looked forward to.

Reid came down the stairs late that morning in early July, and Katie - in her summer dress and sunbonnet - turned to him. “Oh, Reid. You’re coming, good.” She clapped her hands together. “Don’t you look dashing? Now I know you said that you and I could only be friends, but if you change your mind...”

Reid gave her a look.

“Oh, okay. Somebody must have broken your heart back in Chicago. But Reid, you can’t stay single forever.”

“Really?”

“Really. There must be someone in Oakdale who’s caught your eye.”

He said nothing.

 

 

 

 

Everyone was there. Absolutely everyone.

There were the typical events: the judging of the produce and the cattle. There were pies and cakes and pickles to be sampled and awarded as well.

There was also a lumberjack contest of sorts; teams of two men each would compete in the log rolling, the axe throw, the two-man crosscut, and the speed chopping. There was no way that Reid would risk his hands in such a competition. But Luke and Casey and many of the other able-bodied men did take part. And who was Reid to complain? Strong men, rolling up their sleeves, showing off their muscles, getting all sweaty, eventually removing their shirts altogether? He was a very willing spectator.

As Casey and Holden took a turn together, Reid saw both Maddie’s and Luke’s eyes riveted upon their young friend; as they held hands, they both appeared ashamed by their own looking.

When it was Luke’s turn – with a young man whose name Reid didn’t know - it was his turn to be riveted. Reid knew that all eyes were on the two in front of him, so he took the rare opportunity to allow his eyes to linger. From Luke’s head to his toes, from the sunlight shining through his blond locks to the strength displayed in his stance of his calves and the spread of his thighs, Reid didn’t think he’d ever seen a more beautiful human being in his life. He felt a flash of heat pass through him as he imagined that strong body pinning him against a wall.

He swallowed and looked away – right into the eyes of a very jealous Henry, who had been trying unsuccessfully to get his attention all day. Reid shook his head and looked away; he didn’t have the energy to deal with Henry today. They hadn’t been together in a few weeks now; somehow Reid just couldn’t.

 

 

Day turned to evening and the animals all had gone, and only the people and the food were left. The music turned from that of listening entertainment to the sort for dancing. Couples began to take to the “floor” – Katie and Henry; Lily and Holden; Dr. and Mrs. Hughes; Luke and Maddie; a nurse from the hospital approached him a shyly asked him to dance and he reluctantly said yes. Casey brought Faith out to dance. Natalie watched, before eventually dragging her little brother out as well. And many others joined in, people Reid was familiar with but did not really know. After dancing with Luke’s mother and then Katie, Reid excused himself from dancing for a while and simply watched. Couples changed partners and smiles and quiet conversation filled the night air, under the sounds of the musicians.

He hadn’t spent any time with Luke today, and he knew it wasn’t by accident. He and Luke were both avoiding each other.

They had spent a lot of time together in the last month and a half. They were getting closer, sharing more of their thoughts with each other – things they somehow both knew hadn’t been shared with anyone else. There was a closeness that felt right, and yet somehow not right.

Reid was struggling with what he was feeling for this very young man, this man with a girlfriend. And even though Luke appeared to prefer his company to hers, she was still his girlfriend.

Luke and Maddie had seemed to be joined at the hip today, as if they were trying to put things right. Maddie had been avoiding Casey just as much as Luke had been Reid.

The song ended, and as the dancers applauded he saw Maddie leading Luke his way.

“Dr. Oliver, we haven’t danced.” She said.

“I’m sorry, Maddie. Next time.” Reid apologized, avoiding Luke’s eyes. “Tonight, my feet are worn out.”

“Well, alright. But I’ll hold you to that.”

He smiled. “Actually, I’m going to call it a night, I think.”

“Oh, you’re going?” Luke’s voice - trying not to sound disappointed - drew his gaze. He could feel himself being pulled like a magnet to the young man, and it was definitely mutual – he could see it in Luke’s eyes, whether or not Luke understood it himself.

He nodded. “Good night, Maddie…Luke.”

He quickly talked to Katie and Henry, before walking the short distance back to her boarding house. He paced the floors for a good half-hour before making himself lie down. An hour later, sleep came.

For several days, he worked as many hours as he could; on Wednesday, he didn’t meet Luke as usual. He was afraid that if he were alone with the young man, he would simply take him in his arms; and while he was okay with that in theory, in practice Luke had a girlfriend, and more importantly, Luke still didn’t seem to understand his own feelings. He was not going to push Luke into something he wasn’t ready for.

Being a doctor, he knew that he always had a good excuse for not showing up for appointments with friends, but still this felt wrong - simply avoiding Luke, not having the courage to face him.

 

 

 

 

 

On Saturday evening, there was a quiet, insistent knock on his bedroom door. Opening it he found a concerned looking Katie.

“Good. You’re here. I was afraid you might be out or asleep.”

“What is it, Katie?”

“It’s Luke.”

“What? Is he okay?”

“No. Yes…I don’t know. Physically, he seems fine, but otherwise…” she hesitated. “He’s downstairs. He wants to see you. He’s pretty upset, Reid. I don’t know what happened.”

But he had already grabbed his hat and had walked past her out the door.

When he reached the bottom of the stairs, Luke’s eyes met his, and he could see the young man had been crying. He walked right up to him. “Hey,” he said gently. He reached a hand out to touch Luke’s face and pulled it back before he could.

“I’m sorry to bother you…” Luke began. “I just…”

“It’s okay, Luke.”

“Can we…can we talk?”

Reid nodded. “Sure. Do you want to ride out to the farm?”

Luke nodded and they left the house.

 

 

“Shall we pick up Peppercorn?”

“Yeah.” Luke said quietly, after mounting his own horse. “Hop on, it’ll be quicker.” Reid hesitated for a heartbeat before climbing on behind Luke.

They rode together to the Hughes’ and gathered up Reid’s horse and then continued towards the farm.

Luke seemed to have calmed somewhat during the ride. Reaching the farm, the sky had darkened and the moon was hiding amongst the clouds. He dismounted and Reid followed suit, walking their horses into the barn and watering them.

The young man began to pace, running a hand through his hair; every few moments, he would look up towards the rafters, biting his lip as if trying to hold back the tears.

“Luke.” Reid said quietly. “Do you want to talk?”

He stopped pacing and looked at Reid. “I don’t know what…” he began, before looking away again and pulling both his lips in-between his teeth. “What’s wrong with me, Reid?” And Luke began to tremble.

Reid’s heart was breaking, and he stepped cautiously towards him. Luke met his gaze, his eyes begging Reid to hold him. So Reid did; he closed the gap between them and wrapped his arms around him. Luke’s head fell to Reid’s shoulder and Reid’s hand went to his hair, petting him.

“Luke,” he whispered. “Shh, it’s okay.”

And Luke cried, just wept in his arms, clinging to Reid. After a few minutes, his breathing was calmer.

“Luke, what happened?” he asked quietly. Luke lifted his head and peered at him, unsure. “You can tell me anything.”

Luke nodded and took a step away. Then he cleared his throat and faced Reid again. “Casey and Maddie were kissing.” Reid nodded silently. Luke held his gaze, swallowed, and then exhaled. “I can’t do this.”

Reid instinctively stepped closer to Luke; he somehow knew that Luke needed him close. “You can’t do what, Luke?” he asked gently.

Luke appeared as a frightened colt that _so_ wanted to trust the hand reaching out to him. “I can’t tell you,” he said so quietly Reid almost didn’t hear him.

Reid took his hand and held it softly, looking intently at him. “You can tell me _anything_ , Luke.”

Luke looked at him hesitantly, but then slowly nodded. “When I saw them kiss…” he began, eyes wide. “I…” he began to tremble, and Reid laid his other hand on Luke’s cheek, holding his gaze. Luke swallowed, finding a bit of courage. “I was jealous.”

Reid nodded, his two hands keeping Luke from running away from this moment, from his emotions. None-the-less, the young man did try to do just that. He pulled out of Reid’s grasp. “I can’t believe I’m doing this - this is crazy.” Reid took a step towards him. Luke ran his hand through his hair and wiped his eyes. “I’m sure in the morning, all this will make sense.”

“Luke, don’t.”

“Don’t what?” Luke looked back at him.

“Don’t shut me out.”

Luke was affect by those words; His eyes traveled over Reid’s face. “I don’t mean to.” He said quietly, again almost in tears.

“Luke,” Reid said. “Sit with me.” He extended a hand towards the young man. “Please.” And after a moment’s hesitation, Luke took it. Reid led them to corner where there were many bales of hay and they sat down together. They looked at each other and Reid ran a hand over and through Luke’s soft hair, and then his hand traveled down to Luke’s shoulder and he pulled him close against his side.

“Reid…I’m frightened.” Luke said quietly.

Reid nodded against Luke’s head. “I know.” They sat quietly. “Luke?”

“Hmm.”

“You know I’m your friend…” Luke met his eyes and slowly nodded. “Nothing will scare me away.” Luke swallowed and a tear escaped. Reid wiped it away with his thumb, feeling drawn in by Luke’s gaze.

“Reid?” Luke said.

Reid nodded.

“I wasn’t wishing that I was kissing Maddie.” Again Reid nodded, holding him close, their faces inches apart. And another tear escaped from Luke, as his body began to tremble. Reid turned towards him and Luke pressed his face against his chest, Reid’s hand going back to his hair. “What’s wrong with me, Reid?” he whispered through his quiet sobs. Reid pressed Luke close to him fiercely and Luke’s arms went around Reid and they clung to each other.

And then the rain came.

Soft and slow at first, it built until it was a steady summer downpour in a matter of minutes. And the chill of the rain outside the barn doors made them cling even closer to each other and the storm surrounded them so that it felt as if it was just they two in all the world. And Reid leaned back against the hay and Luke followed, laying his head on Reid’s shoulder, their arms still wrapped around each other.

Reid held him close, his nose buried in Luke’s hair, breathing him in, full of emotions; to hold Luke like this felt so good; to see Luke falling apart, however, felt like his own heart was breaking. He pulled him closer still, needing to be one with him. His hand on Luke’s back began to travel of its own accord, running up Luke’s back and into his hair, before making its way back down again, pulling Luke close when his hand reached the young man’s waist again.

They remained close in each other’s arms, grounded in each other, breathing together.

And then it happened.

He felt Luke’s hand slowly move from his waist to his chest; and then there it lay - _still_ , but full of want. Reid could tell, he could feel it; his lips parted as he waited for Luke to move his hand again. His heart hammered in his chest and he could feel Luke’s beating fast as well. Luke slowly began to run his hand inexpertly across Reid’s chest, and Reid let out the breath he’d been holding in a soft pant. Luke noticed - Reid knew - but did not meet Reid’s eye. Reid saw the young man lick his lips, as he watched his own hand touching Reid’s chest, his own breathing becoming more rapid. Luke’s head lay still, almost frozen, on Reid’s shoulder, as if afraid that moving it would cause everything to come crashing to a halt. His hand, however, roamed more freely, down Reid’s chest and then back up, and bravely down Reid’s shoulder to his elbow.

There he paused, and after a few heart beats he lifted his head off of Reid’s shoulder and looked into his eyes. There was a silent acknowledgment on both their parts – no confessions or admissions - but that they both wanted these touches right now. As he began to run his fingers over Reid again, Luke’s eyes dropped away from his, as if ashamed; Reid lifted Luke’s chin, met his gaze, and held it.

They may live in a world that required them to keep their true selves a secret, but they wouldn’t hide from each other.

Reid leaned back – passive – allowing Luke to touch him where he would, his eyes on Luke’s, both their breathing rapid. Luke’s fingers ran across his shoulders and down the front of his chest again, and then they circled; Luke’s eyes told him what they were seeking, until they found Reid’s nipple. He brushed across it, once…twice, his eyes riveted on Reid’s face, watching his response. Luke’s mouth was open and he was softly panting. Reid thought Luke might perhaps climax simply by touching him. That knowledge fed the fire burning inside Reid. Reid’s own mouth was open, softly panting. Luke gently pinched Reid’s nipple and he gasped; Luke repeated that action and Reid’s cock pulsed and throbbed.

Luke leaned even closer towards him and seemed to want to kiss Reid. Reid watched Luke’s eyes as they studied his lips; Luke looked into his eyes, swallowed and hesitated, before leaning in and kissing Reid’s jaw, mouthing it twice. He pulled back and looked at Reid for confirmation that that was okay; Reid’s open mouth, the way he licked his lips, must have encouraged Luke, because Luke was suddenly back, laying kisses along Reid’s jaw line and down his neck. When he reached Reid’s pulse point, Reid let his head fall to the side and held the young man’s mouth to his neck. Luke began to suck, and Reid let out a moan. Luke pressed his body alongside Reid’s; Reid could feel his erection against his hip.

Reid stood up and, pulling Luke with him, he fell back against the wall beside him, his arms pulling Luke hard against him. The sudden movement seemed to snap Luke out of the moment for about two seconds, but then as his needy member pressed against Reid, he closed his eyes for a moment and dove back into the crook between Reid’s chin and shoulder.

“Reid,” he moaned, the first words either had spoken in many minutes. And he pressed against Reid’s body, his desire pushing him onwards, onwards, Reid himself rutting against Luke’s thigh, his hands on Luke’s hips.

And when they came, Luke trembled and shuddered and Reid held him close to his body, slouching into the wall with Luke falling against him.

Less than a minute later, Luke lifted his head and looked at Reid, confusion having replaced his fear. Reid reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief, handing it to Luke. Then he pulled out another, almost clean one and reached inside his trousers to wipe himself off somewhat, before rolling it up to put back in his pocket. Luke cleaned himself up, looking obviously embarrassed, and put the hanky in his own pocket, with an awkward “Thank you.” And then he stepped away from Reid, looking anywhere but at him.

“Luke?” Reid began.

“I’m sorry, Reid.” Luke continued to avert his gaze. “I don’t know why I…”

“Luke, you don’t have to apologize.”

“Yes…yes I do, because I don’t know why I did that.” He met Reid’s eyes briefly. “I’ve never…and I just…”

“Luke,” Reid stepped up to him, but that just seemed to frighten him again.

“Goodnight, Reid.” He said.

“What?” This was all happening way too fast for Reid. “What do you…”

“I can’t talk right now, Reid. It’s late and I’m…I’m confused…and I just…” he looked once more at Reid, his face clearly showing that confusion, plus sorrow. He shook his head and walked out of the barn.

_Oh God, what just happened?_

Reid opened the barn door to stop Luke, but the young man had taken off at a run and was already climbing the steps to the house and pulling the front door open. Reid sighed and then led Peppercorn out into the rain for the wet journey back to Katie’s.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/


	15. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/

  
**Chapter 15**

Luke was confused about a few things.

Was he a homosexual? Did Reid hate him for what he did? Was Reid a homosexual? Or did he let Luke touch him, simply because he’s a man and it felt good to be touched that way? If Reid hates him, was it because he touched him or because he walked off?

Luke was snapping at everyone. He was moody and silent and sullen and distracted. Most of his family has noticed; none has a clue as to why. He missed Reid so much it hurt, and it had only been a couple days. He fantasized about their moment, over and over; it always turned him on; it always brought him shame and fear.

 

 

 

Reid was confused.

Had he pressured Luke? Did Luke hate him? Should he have gone after Luke that night? Should he have these last couple days? Should he now? What would he say if he did? How was Luke doing now? Was he hurting? How could he fix it?

Reid was snapping at everyone. He was moody and sullen and silent and distracted. Katie and Reid and Bob noticed…and nobody had a clue as to why, but they had their theories, none of which were correct. He missed Luke like crazy. He’s thought about their moment several times, but the ones that stayed with him were when Luke was so scared of Reid rejecting him and then when Luke left.

Tuesday afternoon, he was walking down Main St. from the hospital towards home, when Holden suddenly approached him.

“Dr. Oliver.”

Reid looked up – surprised.

“I’m sorry.” Luke’s father replied with a smile. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.” He gently touched Reid’s arm. “You were in your own little world there.”

“Yeah, I guess I was.” Reid said, disoriented to be standing face-to-face with the father of the object of his thoughts. “How can I help you, Mr. Snyder?”

“It’s Luke.”

“Is he alright?” He had Reid’s full attention. “Did something happen?”

“Well, I was kinda hoping that you could tell me.” Reid looked at him for more clarification. “Did something happen between you two?”

“Um, no…um, well…” Reid evaded. “Why do you ask?”

“Well, something’s going on. I don’t know what it is, but he’s not himself…these last few days.”

Reid looked at the older man, of course knowing exactly what had happened but not being clear himself as to what was going on for Luke. He swallowed, wanting to be able to do something for Luke.

“He’s sullen and says not a word to anyone, except when he’s barking at them; and then he’s apologizing left and right for every little thing.” He ran a hand over the back of his head. “I thought maybe he might have talked to you…maybe you had some idea what was upsetting him; you seem close.” He looked to Reid for answers.

“We are.” Reid said softly. “But I haven’t seen him since…in a few days.”

“Which is also strange, don’t you think? You two are joined at the hip lately.”

Reid swallowed, uncomfortable knowing that Holden had noticed his closeness with Luke; and yet he was also comforted by just how observant Holden was when it came to his son’s well-being. “We do enjoy each other’s company.”

“Would you come out? Later tonight? See if he’ll talk to you?”

And Reid couldn’t possibly turn Holden down. He nodded.

“Come for dinner.” Holden offered. “Everyone would love to see you again.”

“Alright.” Reid nodded again. “Thank you.”

 

 

 

When Reid arrived at the farm later that evening, Luke was standing far out in the field, nuzzling the nose of a horse. He brought Peppercorn into the barn and settled her in, and when he walked back out, Luke was running his hand over the side of the horse. Reid watched him; he was so beautiful, and not just physically. He could feel the love that Luke was giving to the horse – he could remember the loving way Luke had touched him the other night. Did Luke reserve any of that love for himself?

He heard the door to the house open and looking over, he saw Emma who waved to him. He made his way over there.

“Hello, Mrs. Snyder.” He took her hand. “Thank you for having me for dinner.”

“Oh, you’re so welcome, Dr. Oliver. Always a pleasure.” She inclined her head towards the door again. “Won’t you come in? Luke will be in soon, I think. He’s been having a bit of a rough time.”

“I know,” he said. “And thank you, I’d love to come in.”

She poured him a cool glass of fresh lemonade and he settled in a chair and they talked while she finished preparing the meal.

In a short while, Holden came in, washed his hands and made his way over. “Good evening, Reid,” he said with a genuine smile, sitting nearby.

Reid nodded. “Thanks for having me, Mr. Snyder.”

“Thank you for _coming_. I hope it helps. I hate seeing him like this.” Holden seemed tired. “Breaks my heart.”

Reid swallowed – he knew the feeling.

Lily, the girls, and Ethan joined them. All they needed was Luke and dinner would be served.

“We’ll give him a few more minutes.” Lily said. “He’s been distracted – never usually late for dinner.” And with a comforting smile, she took Holden’s hand.

The conversation turned to the crops and the weather; then on to some of Lily’s new ideas for her crafts for this fall. Ethan and Natalie started to play jacks on the hearth after a while, and then they all turned when the door opened once more.

“I’m sorry,” Luke began. “I lost track of the time again.” He turned to wash his hands and then stopped as his eyes met Reid’s. Obviously, nobody had told Luke that he was coming tonight. And every emotion in the book passed over his face. Could everyone else read Luke’s emotions?

Luke turned away quickly – to the sink – and took an unusually long time washing his hands. By the time he had turned back around, he had schooled his features.

“Good evening, Dr. Oliver.” Luke said. Reid noted the formal title. “I didn’t know you would be joining us tonight.” He stood close to the group, his hands in his pockets.

“I hope you don’t mind.” Reid responded.

Luke looked into his eyes briefly, and then away. “Of course not.” His smile was so real and so false all at once – again Reid felt his heart might break.

“Well, let’s eat then.” Holden put his hands together and they all got up to find seats at the table.

“Would you like to sit next to me, Dr. Oliver?” Faith asked, smiling sweetly at him.

He nodded back politely. “Thank you, Faith. That would be nice.” She beamed back at him.

After Reid sat, Luke chose the seat farthest away from him – of course, since the table was small, either he would be near him or he would be within good viewing. The latter was the case.

Polite conversation continued throughout the meal. The food was delicious, as always, but Reid hardly noticed. And he tried to stay engaged in the conversations, but his eyes kept drifting towards Luke and so did his thoughts. How was he? What made him run off like that? He had so many questions he needed to ask Luke. Even dessert – blueberry pie – paled in comparison to these thoughts.

 

 

Luke watched as Reid spoke politely to everyone there; he tried to see beyond that outer layer, into the one which Reid had exposed over the last couple months, as they’d shared their thoughts, their dreams. How did Reid feel about him now? Had he ruined the best friendship he’d ever had, by simply not having any self-restraint?

Reid suddenly met his gaze and Luke felt his breath leave him. He willed himself to look away, but he couldn’t.

"Dr. Oliver?” Ethan’s voice brought them both out of their trance.

Reid turned to the little boy. “Yes, Ethan?”

“Will you play ball with me tonight?” he asked.

Reid almost smiled. “Um…” he began.

“It’s too late for that, Sweetheart,” Lily said kindly. “Maybe another time.”

“Alright, Mama,” Ethan said, the picture of proper manners.

“Actually, It’s time for you and your sisters to head upstairs.”

“Me as well, Mama?” Faith asked.

“Yes, you as well, Faith darling.” She smiled at her apologetically. “It’s gotten late for even you. Come on, you three.”

Reid stood with her and took her hand. “Thank you for having me, Mrs. Snyder.”

“Call me Lily, please. And not at all – it’s lovely to have you. Stay as late as you like.” And she turned to the rest. “Goodnight everyone.”

After they left the room, Emma began to remove the dishes from the table.

“Luke,” Holden spoke gently but clearly. “I asked Reid to come tonight.” Luke looked wary. “Because you’ve been so down and, frankly, not at all yourself.” Luke bit his lip and exhaled. “You two seem close, so I thought perhaps…you could talk with him about…whatever it is that’s bothering you.” Luke looked at Reid now and seemed to relax a bit. “I hope you don’t mind…that I just asked him…I just thought maybe it would help.” And with that he stood up and gently squeezed Luke’s shoulder, before turning to help his mother with the dishes.

Luke and Reid looked at each other silently.

“Shall we ride?” Luke asked quietly. Reid nodded and they both got up and Reid followed Luke out to the barn. They got the horses ready in silence and began to ride.

They rode for ten minutes without speaking, as twilight came upon them, each with their own private thoughts.

“Reid?” Luke finally spoke. They slowed down their pace.

“Luke,” Reid responded.

Luke’s heart beat faster, hearing his name on Reid’s lips. He asked the question that had been burning inside him for days. “Do you hate me?”

Reid stopped his horse and turned towards him. “Luke?”

“Yes?” Luke answered in a small voice.

“No, Luke.” He waited for Luke to meet his eyes. “No.”

They held each other’s gaze.

“Why do you ask me that?”

“Well, after the other night…most men would hate me…or be very angry.”

“Luke, most men would have said no…would have stopped you.”

“I know, and you’ve been so kind to me.”

At that Reid barked out a laugh. “You think I was being kind?”

“Um…well, no but…I wasn’t sure…the things I did…”

“ _We_ did, Luke.”

“We did.” Luke held Reid’s gaze. “But I started it,” he apologized.

“Did you now?”

“Um-hm.” Luke shyly looked at him, unsure.

“You know that question about the chicken and the egg, right?”

Luke nodded.

“Who started it, Luke?”

Luke continued to stare at him, waiting for Reid to finish. Reid slid down off his horse. “C’mere.” Reid said. Luke met Reid’s very confident gaze, his breath left him, and he had no choice. He slid down and landed next to Reid, who put his arms around his waist.

“What makes you say you started it?”

“Well, I started to…touch you…first.”

“But I put my arms around you first.”

He pulled Luke closer.

Luke tried to focus.

“Well, I came knocking on your door in the first place.”

“Well, I can beat that.” And Luke laughed a bit. “I moved to town.”

Luke smiled at him, his hands on Reid’s shoulders.

“Luke, we’ve been flirting for weeks now. Who knows when it started or who started it. All I know is…the other night, you were in my arms, and it started.”

“And you don’t regret it?” Luke asked. “You don’t feel like I pushed it on you?”

“Luke, if I’d wanted you to stop, I’d have said so.” Reid looked thoughtfully at Luke. “Do you regret it, Luke?”

Luke looked away and then back into his eyes. “I don’t think so.”

Reid waited, sure that Luke would have more to say.

“Reid I…now that I’m here with you…I don’t regret it.”

Reid cautiously nodded.

“Some of the times these last few days, however…have been really difficult. It goes against everything I’ve been taught, everything I’ve ever assumed about my life.”

Reid nodded again.

“Reid?”

Reid hummed quietly back at him.

“I’m sorry if this hurts you. I wish I could tell you that it all feels just wonderful but, I don’t want to lie to you.”

“And I don’t want you to.” Reid swallowed, then met Luke’s gaze once more. “I want you to always be honest with me, Luke. And not hold back.”

“Like the other night.” Luke smiled softly.

“Like the other night.”

“Reid?”

Reid looked into his eyes.

“You’re okay with it? Being attracted to men? Acting on it?”

Reid nodded. “Yes, Luke.” After a moment he went on. “But I wasn’t always; when I was younger, I had a difficult time with it.” He nodded once more. “It did take some time.”

Luke nodded, loving the feel of Reid’s arms around his waist, their bodies pressed close together.

They held each other’s gaze softly.

“Reid?”

He nodded slightly, continuing to gaze at him.

Luke lifted a hand to Reid’s face; he ran two fingers through his auburn curls, and over the shape of his ear; his fingertip trailed down Reid’s neck to his collar; his eyes found Reid’s mouth next and he was transfixed by it; the beautiful fullness of his lips; Reid wet his lips and Luke – mesmerized by that tongue which had appeared and then disappeared – pursed his own lips in response. After a long moment, his mouth fell open, but he continued to stare at those lips; he was hungry for them. By now, Reid’s lips had parted and he was panting oh-so-quietly.

Luke’s mouth opened and closed, almost with a growl, and he stared at Reid’s lips, willing them to come to him. And they did. Slowly. Reid’s mouth moved closer and closer, at a tortuously slow pace. Finally, Reid’s lips were a breath away and Luke could almost taste them; Reid paused in his journey, locking eyes with Luke, and then softly Reid’s bottom lip brushed against his, and Luke thought he might die, it was so exquisite. But no, he couldn’t die; he needed more. He leaned close to Reid and gently captured Reid’s bottom lip between his own, and then he mouthed it a few times, before releasing it. He met Reid’s gaze again, always those blue eyes did something to him. He stopped – frozen – lips parted and stared into their depths. Then Reid began to lick him.

Luke’s eyes went to half-mast, his mouth opened and he began to pant in earnest, as Reid’s tongue trailed along his lower lip and then dipped inside his mouth. Luke’s lips closed around it and gently mouthed it and then his own tongue came out to meet Reid’s; and when that happened, Reid’s hands thread into Luke’s hair and pulled him close, and their mouths were fused together, lips and tongues being sucked and nibbled and licked; oh, they were hungry – they were both so hungry. They feasted on each other’s mouths, a seemingly contradictory effort, but none-the-less the only thing to be done at such a time when all one desires is the other’s mouth.

They kept at this – this feast without food – for a good ten minutes, before they both pulled back, quietly breathing and smiling at each other.

Luke wrapped his arms about Reid’s neck. “I feel better. My father will be so glad you came.” They both laughed.

“I feel better too.”

“Reid?”

“Hmm.”

“I missed you.” Luke said seriously.

“Oh Luke.” And he pulled him close, flush against him, and then pulled back, laying a hard kiss on his lips. “You can’t know how much I missed you.”

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2151913.html)/


	16. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/[15](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/  
  
 **Chapter 16**

Reid was kissing Luke Snyder. Actually he wasn’t. At the moment he was sitting with three teenagers at a booth in Henry’s pub. Maddie was seated next to him; across from her was Luke and beside him, across from Reid, was Casey. Things were a bit awkward at the moment, what with Luke having ended things with Maddie, and with Casey and Maddie not sure what to do next (and not talking to anyone, including each other, about their kiss) and with Reid and Luke not being able to be open about their relationship.

_Relationship?_ Reid shook his head slightly; he’d analyze that thought later.

At the moment, he was looking at those lips. He knew how they tasted, he knew how they felt; he knew what it felt like when Luke sucked his lower lip into his mouth, gently nibbling it. That’s what Reid meant when he said he was kissing Luke Snyder. Almost a week after their first orgasm, they’d shared their first kiss. Now, a week after that, Reid doesn’t think he’s ever kissed anyone so much in his life. That’s all they’ve done, but he’s not complaining.

And that’s strange. Not only has he never kissed anyone so much, he’s never been so content to simply kiss. Sure, that kissing included ears, and necks, and collarbones, but nothing south of that. But Reid thinks he could be quite happy spending much of the future with his lips exploring Luke Snyder from the neck up – and vice versa – especially since the experience came with the delicious sounds Luke made and the gorgeous, happy smiles on his face.

Raising his eyes to Luke’s, he found Luke’s on him; their eyes met and Luke licked his lips and smiled, and Reid swallowed. They both looked away towards their companions, who appeared to be studying their drinks. Reid knew that Luke wished to broach the subject of their kiss, Maddie’s and Casey’s, with his two friends, to put them out of their guilty misery, to let them know that he was alright with it. But here wasn’t the place.

“So,” Luke said. “I have some news.”

All three looked at Luke now.

Luke took the new satchel that his father had made him, and laid it on the table.

“Did you write something new, Luke?” Maddie asked.

Luke shook his head.

Reid raised an eyebrow, and Luke’s smile back at him was shy and proud.

“Well, show us,” Reid insisted.

Luke licked his lips and opened the satchel. He pulled out some sheets of paper, held together by a paper clip. He held them tentatively for a moment, and then as he handed them to Reid, Reid smiled at the young man, already having figured out what this was.

He took one look at the papers Luke had handed him. “You did it. You’re applying to university.”

Luke nodded. “I did. I am.”

And Reid couldn’t resist. He reached across the table and took Luke’s hand in his own. “Good for you.”

“Wow,” Maddie said.

Casey looked at her, both of them seemingly relieved to have something to think about besides their own guilt. “Yeah, you were actually serious, Luke.”

“Well, I’d never considered the idea before, but yeah…” he looked down and then up again. “I’m nervous, but I’m serious.”

“You shouldn’t be nervous, Luke.” Casey said. “You’re good.” He put an arm around Luke’s shoulder. “Really good.”

“Thanks, Casey. That means a lot.”

His eyes met Reid’s, who’d been watching him. “Has anyone read your application essay for you, Luke.” He asked.

Luke nodded. “My parents.”

Reid smiled, remembering the conversation he’d had with Holden about Luke and further studies.

“They really liked it.” Luke said, blushing, and Reid smiled again at him. “I don’t know if I’ll be accepted, especially since it’s so late, but I’m glad I’m doing it.”

“Good.” Reid looked around at everyone at the table. “So, are you ready to post it? Make it official?”

Luke smiled shyly, looking at the three. He exhaled. “Yes.”

 

 

 

As he handed the parcel to the postmaster, Luke felt as if a brand new chapter was on the verge of being written for his life. He stood still for a moment and then, turning and meeting Reid’s gaze, he knew his thoughts were understood without speaking them. And how good that felt – to have someone understand his soul like that.

The four of them walked down the street until Reid had to part ways with them.

“I’ll see you all soon,” Reid said, Luke knowing that he would see Reid the next day.

“Thank you,” Luke said. “For helping me, encouraging me.” He stepped up and gave Reid a hug, and then he whispered, “thank you so much.”

 

 

The three young people walked on.

“Casey…Maddie, can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure Luke,” Maddie responded.

“Can we sit in the park? It’s…important.”

“Okay.”

They walked on a bit and then found a quiet spot and all three sat together on the grass. Luke fiddled with some grass, not sure how to say this, but hardly able to stand the silence anymore.

“I love you both,” he said.

Maddie looked at Casey, then Luke. “We love you too, Luke.”

“I know. I know you do.” He swallowed and looked at each of them in turn. “And I know things have been rather off between us lately.”

He watched them each color and avoid each other’s eyes.

“I’m sorry, Luke.” Maddie began. “It’s just…”

“I know what it is.”

They both appeared panicked.

“What do you mean?” Casey asked.

Luke hesitated. “I saw you.” He paused. “Kissing, I mean.”

“Oh God.” Maddie put her face in her hands and Casey really did look panicked.

“Luke, I’m so sorry.” He said. “I didn’t mean…I just…oh Jesus.” Casey ran a hand through his hair.

“Is that why you wanted to stop seeing each other?” Maddie asked quietly.

“No…yes.” He paused. “No.”

His two friends both looked stricken and confused.

“It really doesn’t matter why, but it was the right decision.” Then he took Maddie’s hand. “The most important thing I want to say is that I’m okay with it. I know you two are confused – or at least it seems like you’re confused – about how you feel for each other. But I’m okay. I wasn’t at first, when I saw you, but I am now.” And he let go of one of her hands to take Casey’s. “I love you both, and you’re my best friends – and you always will be, no matter what happens here.”

“I’m sorry, Luke.” Casey said. “We both are. It was just once.” Casey again ran a hand through his hair. “And I know that doesn’t make it right. You and Maddie were together and we shouldn’t have and…well, it just happened.”

Luke now knew what that phrase meant. “I know, Case. I know. And I know you’ll sort things out, however they’re meant to be but…Casey, look at me.” He waited for his best friend to meet his eye. “Don’t hold back – if this is right…” and he looked between the two of them. “If it’s right don’t hold back because of me.”

Casey and Maddie looked at each other, still with so much unspoken that needed speaking, and nodded their heads.

“Luke,” Maddie said, looking at him.

“Come here,” he said, and she leaned forward and they held each other. “It’s really okay, Mads, it is.”

She pulled away with a tearful smile.

Then Luke pulled Casey in for a similar hug, feeling the barriers between him and his friend beginning to dissolve again.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2159119.html)/


	17. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/[15](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/[16](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2151913.html)/  
  
 **Chapter 17**

His mother ran her fingers lightly through the hair at his forehead and down to touch his chin. Taking his hands in her own, she kissed him on the cheek.

“Have a _good_ few days, Luke. I hope it’s everything you could want.” Turning to Reid, she added, “Thank you so much for everything.”

He nodded.

“We have to go, Lily. So we don’t miss the train.” His father kissed his mother. “It’ll only be a few days.”

“I know.”

“It’s okay, Momma.” Luke hugged his mother, understanding. This visit to the University of Chicago might only be for a few days, but he knew she was anticipating his probable acceptance. And then it would be a few _years_. And the separation from his family would be a difficult one – no matter how good it was.

 

 

 

 

The three men rode the train, each with their separate thoughts.

Holden was feeling the rightness of this. His son seemed nervous, but excited – like he was seeing a new horizon. It wouldn’t have been _his_ cup of tea, but it would have been for Lily, if women had had such opportunities twenty-five years ago, and it seemed definitely to be Luke’s. His son was gazing out the window, partly watching the terrain go by, and partly in another world, a small smile on his face. Luke turned slightly to look at Reid, sitting beside him, and Holden saw the two of them share a smile. And again he felt that sense of rightness; he was so glad the young doctor had come into his son’s life. There seemed to be an unspoken connection between them. His son seemed lighter, brighter – more alive – ever since this new friendship. And he knew that Reid had played an important part in encouraging Luke to take this step. He was sure that the two would miss each other very much should Luke make the decision to attend in the fall.

Luke suddenly pointed to something out the window, showing Reid, and he quietly spoke something that made the doctor laugh silently. He then went back to viewing the scenery, and Reid to his journal. And Holden smiled once more to see the easy friendship, and his son so happy.

 

 

Reid was only paying half-attention to his journal; his focus was more closely on Luke and what all this must be meaning to him. It must feel so huge - going to university, living in the city. One moment his eyes would light up, whether from something he saw outside the train window or from some thought or anticipation; the next moment Reid would see worry creep across Luke’s features. He almost reached out and took Luke’s hand at one point, but he stopped himself.

Mostly, he averted his gaze from Luke – he’d learned long ago not to look. Everybody like him learned that lesson at a fairly young age. Women he could look at, not men. But he was keenly aware of Luke’s shifting moods, despite his averted gaze.

“Reid.”

Luke’s voice lifted Reid’s eyes from his journal.

“Will you come with me on the campus tour? Tomorrow morning?” Luke turned to take in Holden as well. “It’ll all be new to my father and me, and I don’t know if you had other plans, friends to see, but…”

“I’ll come,” he said.

“If you want.”

He simply nodded with an almost-smile at Luke.

“What are the plans for this evening, Luke” Holden asked.

“Nothing at the school, but Aaron plans to take us all out for dinner.” He said. “Once we’ve had a chance to settle in.”

Luke would be staying at the dormitories with the other visiting, potential students; Reid and Holden were being put up – and very proudly so – by the oldest Snyder son.

 

 

 

Luke looked out the window at the passing terrain, and thought back to a week ago, when he’d received the letter asking him to please to come, despite the short notice, to the three-day event, introducing students and potential students to the very new school. His parents were very happy for him, and his first thought had come right out.

_“I wonder if Reid would come.”_

_“Why don’t you ask him?” Holden replied._

And so he had, the very next day. Reid had hesitated at first.

_“Oh, right…you have to work…of course.” Luke said, embarrassed._

“No,” Reid said. “It’s not that. I just wasn’t expecting you to ask.”

“Do you think you could get away this quickly?”

“I honestly don’t know. I’ll ask Dr. Hughes.”

Luke nodded. “Um…do you want to come?”

Reid nodded and smiled at him. “I’m so happy for you, Luke.”

They had been having a quick lunch at the pub. They’d sat across from each other, holding each other’s gaze, their hands itching to meet.

 

 

Now, here the three of them were, and from the look of the scenery they must be getting close; the trees were further and further apart, and the buildings closer together and taller.

 

 

 

Arriving, they went straight to the school, dropped of Luke, met his “roommate”, and then Holden and Reid headed off to Aaron’s place, with plans to come back in two hours to pick up Luke for dinner.

“Dad! You’re here, good. You made it.”

Aaron hugged his father, and then took Reid’s hand. “Dr. Oliver, how was the journey?”

“It was fine, Aaron. Thank you.”

“Good, good. Here, let me take your things.” He took their bags and walked through the small living room. “I hope you don’t mind doubling up.” His voice called out from the bedroom. He came back out. “I’ll take the sofa. It’s rather lumpy.”

“Oh, that’s fine,” Holden said.

Reid just nodded.

Aaron got them each a glass of lemonade and they sat together, Holden and Aaron doing most of the talking, catching up. Aaron asked Reid about his plans for the next few days and discovered that the doctor was planning to visit a few professional acquaintances, but for the most part, he’d planned to spend his time with Luke.

Before long they washed up and dressed for dinner; then they set to walk back to Luke’s. It was a beautiful evening and so when they arrived they found Luke out front speaking with another young man. He looked beautiful in his dress shirt, his dress pants, and tie. Luke was smiling, listening to the other fellow, unaware of the approaching party. Reid took this unobserved opportunity, and allowed his eyes to travel slowly over Luke. God, he was beautiful. Luke suddenly turned and saw them. Turning back to the young man, they shook hands and parted, Luke heading their way. As he came closer, Reid saw Luke give him the quickest once-over before embracing his brother.

They walked on comfortably, on the warm summer evening, until they came to a place that Aaron had chosen. Its atmosphere was easy and the aromas delicious. They ordered drinks and food; Bread and butter was brought out, and soon conversation was centered on Luke and this weekend, his hopes and plans.

Reid mainly watched and listened, as the three Snyders fell into an easy banter, full of the affection born of years of good living together. It had been a long day for the three travelers and before long, they walked Luke back to campus and said good night. They each gave Luke a hug goodnight, and for that easy Snyder affection Reid was very grateful, for it gave him the opportunity to hold Luke, however briefly. It was just for a couple seconds but still, he felt Luke’s hand on his waist, the other on his back, and he heard his voice whisper, “Sleep well” in his ear before Luke’s strong arms released him.

Lying in bed beside Holden that night, Reid realized that it was the first time in years that he’d fallen asleep beside another human being – not since that time he and Charles had fallen asleep, but they had been drunk. This night it felt strange; he was comfortable with Holden, but there was another Snyder he wished was beside him – and even more strange, the desire for Luke’s body was not primarily sexual, not tonight. He longed for Luke’s arms, his breath and voice, his presence.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2166732.html)/


	18. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!  
 **Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/[15](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/[16](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2151913.html)/[17](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2159119.html)/  
  
 **Chapter 18**

The next morning, Reid and Holden joined Luke for a tour of the campus. The saw all the different spaces - for classes and labs, for worship and recreation, for dining and housing. They met many students and some faculty. And again Reid watched Luke soak it all up – seeing his expression change from wide-eyed wonder, to delight and anticipation, to worry and apprehension. And when he would meet Luke’s gaze, he would see altogether different expressions again – joy, happiness, wonder, uncertainty, desire, and then peace and contentment. Once, when Luke appeared concerned – about what, Reid was unsure – he stepped up beside him, walking with him, and put an arm around his shoulder. Luke turned and looked him in the eye, and Reid saw him inhale and exhale, the concern drifting away on his breath.

And Reid wondered about this feeling inside _himself_ – this contentment that was born of another’s contentment; the joy that was born of his joy; the knowledge that should Luke be sad, he would as well. Had he ever felt this connected, this at-one, with another human being before?

 

 

In the afternoon, Luke continued to get to know the school, with some discussion sessions with faculty and students. Holden rested while Reid looked up a professional colleague – _possibly a friend_. A Doctor Blackstone was his name, and he and Reid had always gotten on well. They talked, and he asked Reid why he’d left the city. Reid told him of Dr. Pierson’s blackmail; he couldn’t tell him the details, but he did tell Dr. Blackstone that much of his rival’s accusations were true. It was nothing Reid was ashamed of, but others wouldn’t understand and Reid could lose his license.

As he left, Reid smiled with the knowledge that he did indeed have a friend in Dr. Blackstone; someone who would listen, who would got to bat against Dr. Pierson, and who would help him set up a practice again, if he planned to return to Chicago. Reid had said that that was the plan, and he’d left feeling a new sense of freedom.

 

 

 

Later that evening, he sat at a table with Luke’s father.

“He’s so much like his mother.” Holden said. “He’s got her eyes and her smile; reminds me so much of her at the same age.”

Reid looked over at Holden, sitting beside him in his suit jacket and tie; he looked very much the farmer, not quite at ease all dressed up for this fancy dinner the school was hosting. But if it looked as if his nice suit was the same one he’d had for twenty odd years, the man _in_ the suit looked comfortable in his own skin – like someone who’d lived a life he was proud of – someone content.

His gaze left Holden and turned towards the younger Snyder, who was in the arms of a girl about his age. Short, curly-brown hair, she was one of the small number of women who might be part of the incoming class. Luke was smiling and chatting with her on the dance floor – it astounded Reid how quickly Luke made new acquaintances. The fact that Reid himself turned down every offer to dance was simply more insight into the differences between himself and Luke.

“He’s always, from the beginning, been so much like his mother. And I’m seeing that much more clearly _now_ – she was only a bit younger than he is now when I first met her. They both have generous, open hearts; they both need reminding to look out for themselves, every once in a while.” He laughed. “They both love their books; Lily would have loved this. I could picture her now, at eighteen, out there mingling and talking, as excited about her upcoming classes as about the boys she might meet.”

Holden was smiling, both at Luke and his own memories.

“How did you meet?” Reid found himself asking. “She didn’t grow up in Oakdale?”

“Lily Walsh?” Holden gave him an incredulous look. “Oh no. She was _from away_ as we say. Her family came to town to spend the summer, and I was hired to teach her to ride; never been on a horse before, you see, and she was engaged to be married – to a _proper gentleman_ – so she had to learn to ride.”

Reid raised his eyebrows at that logic.

Holden laughed. “I know. The man she was to marry lived in the city, but that class thought that a young woman of good breeding should be accomplished in certain things; Lily already played the piano, and was well versed in literature, but she _needed_ to learn to ride.”

Reid sat back and watched the man smile as he told his story.

“Anyway, not that I’m complaining; that’s how we met. I remember the first moment I laid eyes on her. Her hair, her beautiful smile – not to mention, she looked quite fetching in her fancy new riding outfit.”

Reid smiled back at Holden.

“But it was her eyes – I swear her eyes could tell a story all by themselves.” Holden ran a hand through his hair. “Anyway, I’m sure you know what I mean.”

Reid was half-listening, remembering the moment he first laid eyes on Luke at the church supper – and then the moment Luke’s eyes had met his. He knew exactly what Holden was talking about.

“Luke has those eyes – his mother’s,” Holden was now saying. “So often I know just what he’s thinking or feeling without him saying a word.”

Holden looked over at him and Reid smiled a bit.

“I’m glad he has a friend in you, Reid. He’s…he seems happier somehow.” Holden’s brow furrowed. “Since your arrival.” He nodded his head. “And I’m glad,” he concluded, simply.

Reid held Holden’s gaze, and half-smiled in acknowledgement.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2196754.html)/


	19. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

 

 

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/[15](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/[16](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2151913.html)/[17](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2159119.html)/[18](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2166732.html)/  


**A/N** : So sorry it's been forever long since I posted, but I was desperately trying to recapture my life, which had been bad and had run away from me. Now I've tentatively caught it, and can hopefully keep it on a leash. So, as a reward, I get to post this chapter.

Time has stood still for all these wonderful characters, which of course I don't own, blah, blah, blah, etc. It is now the next day and Reid, Luke, and Holden are still in Chicago, visiting the University, staying with Aaron.  
 **Chapter 19**

Luke and Reid sat in two hardback chairs around Aaron’s kitchen table. It was small and quarters were close, so their knees touched; Luke found it very distracting.

He’d spent the morning speaking with several other young people and the advisor for the writing program. It had been amazing; he’d gotten so fired up from those conversations.

The afternoon had been spent playing sports with other young men; it been yet another confusing encounter with the male body and his attraction towards it. Especially when a group of girls had appeared to watch. _How come he was more concerned with the other guys than with the girls?_ Sometimes he still wished he were like all the other guys.

But sitting here, seeing Reid’s beautiful face, hearing his voice, feeling the slight touch of his knee – right here, right now, Luke couldn’t ask questions of why or how come or what if. When he was near Reid, sometimes his mind was whirling with thoughts and ideas, and other times, like now, the only thoughts were, _he’s so beautiful_ and _I want to hold him_ and _God, look at those lips_.

“So, this is serious, huh?”

At the sound of Aaron’s voice, Luke left his daze, realizing he actually _had_ been staring at Reid’s lips. _Had anyone noticed?_

“What?” Luke asked.

“Well, it looks like you’re pretty serious about this…school, I mean.”

“I haven’t said yes yet, but…”

“But you’re going to. I know you, little brother.”

Luke smiled at him.

“And I know you’ll take it plenty seriously – and I’m not encouraging you to do otherwise – but don’t forget to have a little fun.”

“I will.”

“I’m sure Luke will find his nitch,” Holden said.

“Yeah.” Aaron looked at Luke. “So, I hear you ended things with Maddie.”

“Um, yeah. A few weeks ago.”

“Seemed like things were going pretty well. Did something happen?”

“Well, um…” Reid’s leg pressed up against his knee a bit, and he smiled, giving Luke permission to not explain.

“That’s okay, you don’t have to say…sometimes these things just don’t work out.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“So, you gonna play the field, huh? Somehow that seems more my style than yours.” And he winked at his little brother. “Whatever. Something tells me you’ll be far too busy studying to be making any romance.”

“Yeah, probably so…” Luke said.

“Well, we’ll be sure to get together, and I could introduce you to some nice young ladies.”

“No, that’s alright, I’ll just…” Luke began.

“You’ll meet girls your own way, I know. But something tells me you won’t be meeting too many of them at that school of yours.”

“No I, um…” Luke was struggling to understand, never mind put into words, what he was feeling.

“Hey, that’s alright; you’ll be fine.” Aaron said, reaching to lay a hand on Luke’s arm.

Luke tried to smile back at him.

“So.” Aaron’s hand fell to the table with a thud. “Who wants to go out?”

“Out?” Holden asked with a yawn. “It’s late.”

“Not for us, right Luke?” Aaron continued.

“Um, I don’t know.” Luke said, looking first at Reid and then at Aaron.

“There’s amazing stuff happening in this city on a Friday night; don’t you agree, Dr. Oliver?”

Reid looked up. “Um.”

Aaron stood. “Let me show you around; it’ll be fun.”

“Okay.” Luke said, actually looking forward to it. “Reid?”

“Sure; I’m game.”

“Great.” Aaron said, winking at Luke. “And you can meet the girl I’m dating this week.”

Reid rolled his eyes and Luke laughed.

 

 

 

Before they knew it, they’d said goodnight to Holden and the three had walked into the club part of the city. Aaron showed them a few places where there were amazing musicians playing, people dancing, and they met Aaron’s “girlfriend” and a few of her friends, who promptly began flirting with Luke and Reid.

After a while, it was getting late and Aaron wanted to see a few more places with his girl, but Reid wanted to show Luke some other spots so they parted ways.

Reid and Luke walked and walked in the relative quiet of the late night in the city. They still couldn’t hold hands, but they could glance at each other more freely and it felt so good to Luke. He hadn’t realized what it would be like – to resist gazing at this beautiful man for fear of the knowing-scrutiny of his brother and father’s eyes.

Suddenly Reid stopped in front of a club; Luke heard jazz music pouring from it, and he saw colorfully dressed men and women happily entering and leaving.

“Should we check it out?” Reid asked.

“I don’t know.” Luke said. “I’m pretty tired and we’ve seen a lot of places.”

“We haven’t seen this one.”

“What’s so special about this one?”

Reid inclined his head. “Trust me.”

“Okay.”

Reid walked up the steps and Luke followed. The room was smoky, like all the other clubs. The music was extraordinary and there were many couples dancing.

They sat at a table and ordered a couple beers, listening to the music and watching the dancers. They glanced at each other and Luke thought he might crawl out of his skin with the longing to touch Reid.

“Do you want to dance?” Reid asked.

“Yes, but…” and he leaned in closer to whisper. “Only with you.”

“Well, that’s good, because I only want to dance with you.”

“I wish we could.” Luke said. “Oh Reid, I know it’s crazy, but I wish we could.”

“We can.” Reid said. “Haven’t you noticed?”

“Noticed what?” Luke asked.

“Look at the dance floor, Luke…really look.”

The room was smoky, so he hadn’t really seen – besides, how could he have known that such places existed – but sure enough there were men dancing together, and women dancing together, and some couples appeared to be a man and a woman, but Luke wasn’t sure if they were.

He looked back at Reid.

“Will you dance with me, Luke?”

He looked again at the odd couples on the dance floor, and felt a mix of emotions. He thought they looked wrong, unnatural. He pictured himself out there, with Reid, and he wanted it, even though he still felt it was wrong.

“Luke?”

“I…”

“Hey,” Reid said softly, taking his hand. “Look at me.”

Luke looked into Reid’s eyes, and it calmed him a bit. His sense of grounding began to return. He nodded. Reid stood and took Luke’s hand and they walked to the dance floor together. Reid turned to face him and Luke stepped up close to him. Reid put his right hand on Luke’s waist, and Luke put his left on Reid’s shoulder, their other hands clasped together. Luke had never danced in this position – the girl’s position. He felt his stomach turn – _was this wrong?_ He gazed at the other couples up close, and some of them looked so odd, so made up, so pretentious – and others looked oddly natural, like they were so at-home, here in this place where they were allowed to be themselves.

Then he turned his gaze back to the man whose arms were holding him, and none of it mattered. The right or wrongness; the oddity; the girl’s position. None of that mattered. All that mattered were _his_ eyes, his arms, his smile. All that mattered was that it felt so right when his arms were around him - when his face gazed upon him. All night, all day, he had been longing to hold Reid, and now he was.

He stepped closer to Reid, so that their feet were somewhat mixed together, so their hips were pressed together, so Reid’s arm encircled his waist more firmly, and so his cheek came to rest against Reid’s curls. And he closed his eyes, wanting never to leave this place. And after several minutes, when he opened his eyes again, he saw around him, not oddities, but human beings – people trying to live their lives, day by struggling day; people taking a breather from the strife, standing in the arms of a beautiful man or woman, perhaps someone they love, perhaps simply someone who didn’t judge who they were.

And Luke pulled Reid closer, and Reid seemed to sense Luke’s heightened emotions, and he ran a hand through Luke’s hair and pulled him closer as well. Then Luke pulled back and looked into his eyes with a small smile.

“Thank you,” he said.

“You’re welcome,” Reid responded.

Luke’s eyes traveled back and forth between Reid’s eyes and his lips, and Reid’s did the same. It had been so long, so many days since they’d last kissed. Luke asked with his eyes… _is this okay? Can I?_ Reid smiled slightly and his tongue darted out from between his lips. That did it. Luke’s gaze settled on Reid’s mouth, so needing to taste it again. Gravity pulled him in until he was putting his own lips around that beautiful mouth, and _oh my_ there it was. He’d found the place he never wanted to leave…his lips surrounding Reid’s. He let go and pulled back slightly.

“Reid.” He whispered.

Reid pulled Luke’s mouth back to him, and planted a firm kiss on his lips, his hand in Luke’s hair. Luke was lost in the moment – God, it was so good.

When their lips parted a few moments later, Luke flushed and looked around the dance floor; but no one had even seemed to notice, except one older couple, who smiled at Luke, as if remembering a long ago memory.

“I’ve missed you so much, Reid…I mean…” and he blushed. “God, that sounds ridiculous, we’ve spent the last three days together.”

“I know what you meant, Luke.” Reid said, his eyes lingering on Luke’s before dropping down to his mouth once more.

Luke felt the heat of Reid’s gaze. His mouth dropped open, and he was aware of every place where his own body met Reid’s. Reid lifted his gaze again to Luke’s eyes. They both could see the want in each other’s eyes. A want they couldn’t act on, not here, not now…a want they _hadn’t_ acted on since that first night in the barn, after Luke had seen Casey kiss Maddie, almost a month ago. Luke wasn’t sure what exactly he wanted, but it had to do with this man, and being in his arms, his body pressed up against him – it had to do with his lips and eyes and voice.

“Reid,” he whispered, pulling him close, and threading a hand into his curls. “I wish we could stay right here.” He let his hand travel down and then up Reid’s back. “You…in my arms; me in yours.”

“I know, Luke.” He pulled back to look Luke in the eye. “But, tomorrow we go home.”

Luke sighed and smiled, knowing that would be better. “Will you come riding with me, soon?”

Reid nodded.

_Before I leave_ , Luke added silently.

But Reid heard, and he nodded again.

And they spent quite a while on that dance floor, arms around each other, foreheads pressed together, sharing a few slow kisses, breathing each other in – almost enough to make up for the lack of touch during the last three days – trying not to think too much about what it would be like when Luke returned here, alone, in a couple of weeks. They danced until they both knew it was time to go, time to head back to Aaron’s. And when they got there, Luke’s father and brother were both asleep, but they took no chances. No lingering touches, no kisses. And Reid let Luke sleep in the bed beside his father, while he curled up on the floor beside the bed. And then there, in the dark and privacy of the room, Luke reached down to brush a hand through Reid’s curls, and Reid took his hand, laying it against his mouth, kissing his fingertips before placing Luke’s hand back on his head, feeling the connection to him.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2212509.html)/


	20. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/[15](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/[16](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2151913.html)/[17](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2159119.html)/[18](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2166732.html)/[19](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2196754.html)/

  
**Chapter 20**

Luke’s hand was inside his shirt, caressing his chest, brushing over and pinching his nipples; the young man’s lips were sucking on his neck. God, it was good; _God, he wanted more_.

“Luke,” he moaned.

Luke smiled against his neck, licking him. His hand ran down his chest – again - almost reaching the waistband of his trousers, before making the return journey to Reid’s chest.

Luke had made his decision, he was going to University in a week’s time, and Reid had seen him almost every day for the last ten. Sometimes they’d met for lunch, and Reid had been over for dinner once with Luke’s family; a few times, they’d gone for a ride, like today. Now they were miles away from the Snyder farmhouse, and miles away from any prying eyes.

Leaning against the tree, he watched with misguided anticipation, as Luke’s hand made the descent again, only to stop short of the Promised Land once more.

“Luke,” he said again. His voice must have sounded different this time however, because the young man looked at him; and Reid saw that Luke wasn’t teasing; he was simply unsure and afraid.

Luke swallowed, breathing heavily, but looking like a lost doe at the same time. Reid reminded himself of the vast difference between his own sexual experience and that of Luke’s. He took the young man’s chin in his hand and laid a soft, deep kiss on his lips.

Luke panted back at him. “Reid…I love touching you.”

“I love it when you touch me, Luke.”

And he rolled them over until Luke was lying on his back on the blanket, and Reid propped himself up on an elbow and looked down at him. He ran a finger down Luke’s torso, untucking Luke’s shirt and slipping his hand underneath it. “Can I touch you, Luke?”

Luke exhaled and nodded, resting his arms over his head on the blanket and biting his lower lip.

Reid pushed his hand up under Luke’s shirt until he brushed across a nipple, and Luke inhaled; he brushed it a few more times, watching Luke’s response. Luke’s eyes almost closed and his mouth dropped open, his hands forming fists over his head. Reid removed his hand and placed it against Luke’s jaw, running his finger over Luke’s lower lip before leaning in to place a soft kiss on his mouth.

Luke’s head lifted off the ground, his lips not losing Reid’s, as he kissed him back. “Reid,” he moaned. His head fell back to the ground, and he looked back up at him hungrily.

Reid smiled down at him and held his gaze as he unbuttoned the top button of Luke’s shirt. Luke appeared aroused and scared.

“We won’t go anywhere you don’t want to, Luke.”

Luke began to relax.

“Is this okay?”

After a moment, Luke nodded.

Slowly he finished unbuttoning Luke’s shirt, and then opened it and looked at him. “So beautiful,” Reid said quietly, causing Luke to catch his breath.

And Reid touched him; he touched Luke softly, watching him. Reid knew that Luke had never done this. He’d never been touched like this by anyone; he was sure that he and Maddie had never gone this far; he could tell from Luke’s response – this was _brand new_.

“Reid,” Luke said in a shaky breath. “Oh, Reid.”

Reid smiled down at him, his fingers trailing in circles around Luke chest, narrowing in to find Luke’s nipple.

“It feels good…” Reid said, and Luke nodded.

Reid slowly leaned over him and licked his nipple with the tip of his tongue. Just once – then his eyes met Luke’s wide ones. Luke seemed to have stopped breathing. Reid half-smiled at him, and then went back to Luke’s chest. When his mouth made contact with Luke’s nipple, Luke exhaled and inhaled, his breathing stopping again. Reid mouthed at it and gave it a little suck.

“Oh,” Luke sang quietly.

Reid did it again and when he pulled back up to look into his face, Luke arched his back. He leaned closer in towards Luke, his hand exploring the hair on his broad chest, while his lips trailed kisses along his jaw and to his neck. And he listened to the beautiful sounds Luke was making.

Luke’s hand made it into his curls, subconsciously keeping Reid’s lips close to his neck; his other hand trailed down Reid’s side to his hip, pulling him close.

Reid caressed Luke’s cheek and laid kisses on one side of his face up to his forehead and down the other side to his lips, sucking on the bottom one. “Luke,” he said.

Luke exhaled and Reid could feel his smile, feel how happy Luke was; he pulled back to return that smile.

“Reid, “Luke said, grabbing on to Reid’s hip and pulling him close. His hand traveled up Reid’s back and then back down, stopping at his waistband, but seeming to want to go further, then hesitating before heading back up Reid’s spine and into his hair. Reid held Luke’s gaze as his hand moved lower once more.

“Luke,” he said.

“Hmmm?” he responded.

“It’s okay.” Reid said.

“What?” Luke swallowed.

“Whatever you want. It’s okay.”

Luke lowered his gaze and then raised it again to meet Reid’s. He moved his hand slightly lower, to Reid’s low hip, then looked at Reid; his hand then continued on until it rested on Reid’s ass.

Reid dipped his head and began kissing Luke’s chest, pressing his hips into Luke’s thigh. Luke’s hand ran over his ass and then pulled him close.

“Reid, I’ve never felt like…it’s so strong…I want…”

Reid pulled back to look in his eyes, silently encouraging him to continue.

Luke licked his lips, hesitating, and then he spoke quietly. “I want to touch you _everywhere_ , Reid.”

Reid nodded imperceptibly. Luke’s gaze was intense, with desire and fear.

“That’s okay, Luke.” He knew that Luke needed to go through his own process – find his own way to accept himself for who he was. Nobody could do that for him, and it would take as long as it would take.

Luke’s fear seemed to subside again – perhaps temporarily – his desire rearing up again, as his hand traveled up Reid’s side, cupping Reid’s face and pulling him down for a deep kiss.

Reid didn’t want to pressure Luke, but he also knew that he was going to have to lead the way. Luke was too scared to initiate the taking of what he wanted. He leaned back slightly, looked down into Luke’s eyes, and then ran his hand down Luke’s chest to the waistband of his trousers.

He said nothing with words, simply held Luke’s gaze; he didn’t ask permission, but just acted, letting Luke’s response be his guide.

He opened the top button on Luke’s trousers; Luke’s mouth opened and then closed, his eyes widened; but otherwise his body was still. Reid’s gaze held his and he freed the next button. One of Luke’s hands thread into Reid’s hair, grabbing a fistful of curls; the other lay on his thigh, opening and closing with want and trepidation. Reid popped a third button open, his eyes silently on Luke.

Luke’s hand reached towards Reid’s fly, pulled back, and then reached forward again; he ran the tip of a finger over the bulge in Reid’s pants; Reid inhaled, and Luke looked up into his eyes.

Luke lowered his gaze, licked his lips, and touched Reid again.

Reid’s eyes were on Luke’s face, watching him take all this in. He felt Luke’s hand cup him, and he saw Luke’s mouth drop open with a hungry look. And when Luke opened the top button of Reid’s fly, he could feel the young man begin to tremble. His fingers then seemed to go into fast motion, desperate to free Reid from his confines. He trembled and it took some doing, but finally Luke had finished the last button, and then he hesitated before looking up into Reid’s eyes again.

Reid could see that both Luke’s desire and his fear had intensified.

Reid freed his own throbbing manhood from his boxers, and let it lie there, hard, against his thigh. Luke stared at it and then met Reid’s gaze once more. His fear seemed to be battling his desire.

Reid took Luke’s hand and laid it on his cock. Luke inhaled sharply, his eyes fixed on the sight, and then he began to stroke Reid, slowly.

Reid was incredibly aroused; he knew, even with all his experience, that this simple act on Luke’s part would bring him to climax very quickly. “Luke,” he whispered. “God, Luke.”

Luke looked into his eyes, seemingly amazed at what he saw there – at the desire he saw there. He stopped stroking Reid and quickly freed his own cock, taking Reid’s hand and laying it upon him. Then he wrapped his own hand around Reid once more.

“Yes,” Reid said.

They both began to stroke each other steadily, their desire building fast.

“Jesus, Reid…it feels so…good.” Luke panted.

“God, yes.” Reid responded. He leaned across Luke and wrapped his lips around the young man’s mouth, sucking on his lower lip.

While his one hand moved on Reid’s member, Luke’s other clenched and unclenched in his curls. Reid moaned into Luke’s mouth and then their lips parted as they held each other’s gaze, panting – stroking each other faster and faster – until they both came, Reid with a low groan and Luke with a higher pitched sound of ecstasy.

 

 

 

 

 

Luke lay in his arms, thinking; Reid could practically hear the wheels in his head turning. He ran a hand up Luke’s back and into his hair, and he kissed the top of his head. Luke settled closer against him, his arm across his chest – still Reid could tell something was wrong.

“Luke,” he said.

Luke hummed a response but didn’t look at him.

“Luke…look at me.”

He did, with a small confused smile.

Reid studied his face, lovingly, both trying to figure out what was troubling him and trying to reassure him.

“What is it, Luke?”

Luke sat up and ran a hand through his hair. “I’m not sure.” He looked at Reid. “Is this okay, Reid?”

Reid sighed and then was silent for a moment.

“Do you mean what we just did?”

Luke nodded. “Yeah.”

Reid reminded himself that he asked the same questions at Luke’s age. “I don’t know, Luke. I don’t think there’s one right answer.”

“Really?” Luke’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“To some people it might not be okay. But me it is…it was; I mean, here with you, it’s right.”

Luke pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. “I’m sorry.” He said.

Reid swallowed, afraid to ask. “What are you sorry about?”

“I’m sorry that I can’t tell you that I’m okay with this.”

Reid looked at him and remembered Holden’s words about Luke needing reminders to take care of himself, not just others. “Hey,” he said as he crawled closer to where Luke sat on the blanket; he sat behind the young man and wrapped his arms around him. “Hey, it’s okay. You feel what you feel, Luke. Don’t pretend…please don’t pretend with me. I’d rather know…” he brushed Luke’s hair from his eyes and kissed his cheek. “I’d rather know the truth than have you…” Reid couldn’t go on, and he shook his head, not sure what to say.

Luke turned his head and kissed him. “The _truth_ …” Luke said. “…is that when I’m with you my life makes more sense than it ever has.” He leaned against Reid, pulling his arms closer around him. “The other feelings…how much I _want_ you…that scares me…and I always thought it was wrong.”

Reid nodded against his hair; he knew, too well. “And you still wonder if it’s wrong.” Reid said.

“Yes and no. It’s very confusing; part of me thinks it’s wrong, and part of me thinks it’s right – so right.” He turned his head again, and laid a hand on Reid’s cheek. “I’m sorry,” he said.

“Don’t,” Reid said softly, but firmly. “Don’t apologize for who you are – not to me, not to anyone.”

“Okay,” Luke said, smiling softly at him, and he kissed the young man once more.

[next part](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2237836.html)/


	21. Perception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

**Author:** PABWECG (aka Patricia)  
 **Title:** Perception  
 **Genre/Type:** Romance, Period fic  
 **Rating:** PG-13 to NC-17  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Luke/Reid, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Maddie, and Henry, amongst others  
 **Warnings:** Nope  
 **Summary:** The year is 1898; Luke lives on Snyder farm, and Reid is a doctor in Chicago; you’ll figure the rest out.

Big thanks, again, to Slayerkitty, for being my beta!!!

**Previous Chapters:** [1](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2030506.html)/[2](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2032615.html)/[3](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2034667.html)/[4](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2036829.html)/[5](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2039970.html)/[6](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2041790.html)/[7](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2047536.html)/[8](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2053760.html)/[9](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2061498.html)/[10](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2066588.html)/[11](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2072588.html)/[12](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2078975.html)/[13](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2085960.html)/[14](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2115600.html)/[15](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2139206.html)/[16](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2151913.html)/[17](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2159119.html)/[18](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2166732.html)/[19](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2196754.html)/[20](http://lure-atwt.livejournal.com/2212509.html)/

  
**Chapter 21**

Luke lay on his bed in his dorm room – semi hard. His mind was not on the Ethics class he’d just left an hour ago; nor was it on the stimulating discussion he’d had yesterday with Cecelia following history class. Neither was it on the Halloween party that his roommate was pestering him to go to next week.

He was thinking about how long it would be before he saw Reid again, how long it had been since he’d seen him. More specifically, he was replaying – again – what happened the last time they’d seen each other.

Reid had arrived very late to the BonVoyage dinner at the farm, due to hospital emergencies. The party was winding down, with most of the small gathering already left for home. Luke had given up on his showing, understanding the reason, but disappointed nonetheless. His heart had leapt at seeing him arrive. He looked so beautiful. And for a while, Luke was content just having him there, in the room, so happy he’d really come. But before long it wasn’t enough; Luke needed to get him alone. He needed to hold him and kiss him; he needed to look at him without any watchful eyes, before he left the next morning.

 

 

_“Luke,” Reid moaned in his ear. “God, Luke.”_

_They managed to make it out to the barn and were occupying one of the empty stalls. Luke was backed up against the wall and Reid’s hands were on his hips; he could feel Reid’s body aligned with his own, from head to toe._

_Reid’s hand slipped under his shirt and ran over his warm skin. “Luke,” he whispered. “Is this okay?”_

_Luke nodded several times. “Please.” He said quietly._

_Reid looked him in the eye. “Are you sure?”_

_Luke knew that Reid didn’t want him to regret this. “I’m still a little confused…unsure…I am.” He ran a hair into Reid’s curls. “But I think if we stop, I might die…please Reid, touch me.”_

_And Reid did. Even if there were some lingering doubts on both their parts, they couldn’t help it._

 

Luke lay on his bed, his hand pressing against the front of his trousers – closing his eyes, he was transported back to that night.

 

_Their quiet panting and whispers sounded loud in the barn, but were thankfully hidden amongst the occasional snort of an animal. Reid found Luke’s skin, his hand and mouth trying – it seemed – to memorize the contours of his chest and back and belly._

_Luke’s hand traveled down Reid’s side and slipped in between their bodies, running his knuckles over Reid’s hardness. Reid grabbed his ass with one hand, pulling him hard against him, diving into the crook of his neck to suck and lick. “Luke,” he said, as they both rut against each other, desperately trying to get closer._

_Reid pulled back and looked him in the eye, walking over to a hay bale; Luke sat down on the hay, his eyes on Reid. Reid spread his legs apart and knelt between Luke’s thighs, as Luke leaned against the wall behind him, unsure, but quietly panting with desire. Reid leaned in and captured Luke’s mouth and Luke’s hands began to unbutton Reid’s shirt, then reaching in to feel his smooth, strong, chest._

_He felt Reid’s hands begin to free his pants buttons, and Luke froze. His eyes met Reid’s and after silent acknowledgement, he began to do the same in return._

 

Luke now slipped a hand inside his trousers, taking a hold of his own manhood, which was in such need of attention. As his hand slipped up and down it, he closed eyes, remembering what happened next.

 

_Reid lay kisses on his shoulders and down his chest to his nipples; he spent time sucking and nipping each of them, occasionally giving Luke’s member a stroke. It felt so good; Luke’s eyes were closed, and his hand was stroking Reid. Luke felt Reid’s mouth trail down to his belly, and as it moved even lower, Luke opened his eyes. Reid’s eyes were closed; Luke watched as Reid opened his mouth and wrapped his lips around the tip of his penis._

_“Holy Jesus,” Luke cried out._

_Reid’s hand covered his mouth._

_Luke had never even dreamed of such a thing – never. But God, it felt good._

_Reid’s mouth - warm and wet - engulfed more and more of him, and Luke felt as if he were sinking into the hay bale beneath him; sinking into oblivion or heaven. And it was so quick; Luke didn’t know what had hit him – never felt climax come this quick before. And he did – he came with Reid’s mouth around him, his hips bucking off the hay bale, one hand on Reid’s shoulder._

 

Luke’s hand sped up, a blanket stuffed in his mouth to muffle his sounds, and he came hard, so hard; and he remembered how Reid had held him close that night, still on his knees in front of him, bringing himself to climax, laying kisses on Luke’s neck.

“Oh God,” Luke said, panting and out of breath, grateful that his roommate hadn’t walked in. He wiped his hand on a handkerchief.

He missed Reid so much; he missed all of Oakdale, really…but Reid…that was different. And it wasn’t just the touching, the kissing…he missed his eyes, his voice…he missed his friendship and trust…he missed his laughter and his strong arms; he missed Reid inside and out, completely. It would be another two months before he was able to look into his eyes, feel his arms, hear his voice. He ran his palms up his chest and held himself, wrapping his arms around his own belly as if they were Reid’s. Thinking about Reid made him feel homesick and at-home all at once; he supposed he felt the same way about his family, but it was stronger somehow with Reid. And there definitely were _other_ feelings that he felt for Reid that he decidedly did _not_ feel for any of his family.

He smiled and licked his lips, still amazed at the desire that Reid – or even just thoughts of Reid – could elicit in him. He wondered if he had the same effect on Reid. Logic told him that he did; there seemed to be plenty of evidence when they were together, that Reid was just as aroused by him as well. But Luke also knew that Reid was older, more experienced; he must be used to being with men who do _other_ things, things he and Reid hadn’t done. Things Reid hadn’t pressured him to do, but things Luke was sure Reid was going to _want_ to do.

How long would Reid wait? Did Luke want to do those things?

Two months ago, he’d had no clue what two men would do in bed – he felt silly admitting that to himself now, but it was true. He’d felt desire for something that had very much to do with men and their bodies, for several years now, that was true; but it was equally true that he’d never really known or imagined the specifics of acting on that desire, other than his standby fantasy of another man’s hand on his erection.

But now Luke _did_ know. He lived in the city now. He’d learned a lot; listening, reading. Of course, much of the information on homosexuality condemned it, and that only increased Luke’s confusion. But at least there was information. And he had to admit, when he discovered all the things two men might do together in bed, he had mixed emotions. The thought of a man putting his penis…there…well, it wasn’t altogether pleasant. But the thought of Reid doing that – to him…he felt many of the things he felt when they’d gone dancing at that club. There was something unnatural about it, something that went against everything he’d ever learned about human sexuality. And yet, with Reid…the thoughts were infused with tenderness and desire and something that felt like home.

The whole thing was very confusing; but what wasn’t confusing was imagining being in his arms, seeing him laugh in the sunlight, seeing his face when he’d come from the hospital having just brought a new ray of sunshine to a patient’s family; hearing his voice whisper Luke’s name; watching his mouth fall open and feeling his body tremble when he came. All of _that_ was clear – he knew he wanted more of that.

He sat up and got off his bed, walking to his dresser to quickly rinse his hands. Then he sat down at his desk to compose another letter to Reid; he simply never ran out of things to tell the man. He wondered if Katie thought it odd that Reid was receiving a letter from him every week; of course she would have really thought it odd if she had any idea how many different days’ thoughts were contained in that one week’s envelope.

He wrote and wrote, of his classes and his new ideas; of the city’s sights and his new friends; of how much he missed him and longed to hold him. And when he was done, he wrote a quick, but affectionate letter home, with a request to his mother to pass along hello’s and hugs to Maddie and Casey as well.

Then he set the letters aside to put in the next day’s post, and he set to the task of his assignments. He was feeling the weight of his courses; it was standard practice for freshman to take five classes, but Luke – with the help of a recommendation from Mrs. Henderson back in Oakdale – had managed to persuade his advisor to allow him to attempt six this semester. Now Luke was feeling it; he didn’t doubt that he could handle it, but he knew that he needed to put in the time and the focus to make it happen. So, he put all thoughts of home, and especially Reid, aside for the next several hours and was very productive.

So engrossed was he in his work that when Tommy, his roommate, did come back from his afternoon class, Luke was surprised to see how dark it had become. He packed up his work and together they walked to the dining hall for supper.


End file.
